Three construction workers were sitting on the bridge that they were building, having their lunch break. The first guy says, "If I get a Vegemite sandwich again, I am going to jump off this bridge." The second guy says, "If I get a peanut butter sandwich again, I am going to jump off this bridge." The third guy says, "If I get another strawberry jam sandwich, then I am going to jump off this bridge." The next day, the first guy gets a Vegemite sandwich, the second guy gets a peanut butter sandwich, and the third guy gets a strawberry jam sandwich. All three guys jump off the bridge and die. The next day at their funerals, the first wife says, "If he just told me, I would have given him a different sandwich." The second guy's wife says, "It is all my fault. If only I knew." The third wife says, "I don't get it, he makes his own lunch."
How many screws does it take to construct a lesbians bed? None, it's all tongue and groove...
I would tell you a construction pun, but I'm still working on it.
Chuck Norris built the hospital he was born in.
Smaller babies may be delivered by a stork, But bigger ones need a crane.
Yo mama so fat, even Bob the Builder said, "We can't fix that!"
I refuse to believe my dad got fired as a road worker for theft. But when I came home, there were signs everywhere.
The twin towers are like genders, there used to be two of them.
My ceiling isn't the best... But it's up there!
I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.
But when I got home, all the signs were there.
What game did Al-Qaeda Play With The Twin Towers On September 11th 2001? Jenga.
The experienced carpenter really nailed it, but the new guy screwed everything up.
Why do people keep on making jokes about the twin towers?
Because they go down so well.
What were the twin towers plains?
God's playing Jenga.
Two fish walked into a wall. One said to the other, "Dam!"
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
Why should you be wary of stairs? -- Because they are always up to something.
Why were the Twin Towers mad? Because when they spawned in a Minecraft world, all they got was plains.
How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thin you slice them-hope marie lawson
Do you have a shovel? Because I’m digging that ass
