A man is walking on the deck of a cruise ship, when he sees a woman, without arms and legs, crying. The man says “What’s wrong?” The woman says “I’ve never been hugged before.” So, the man gives her a hug and walks away.

The next day, the man sees the woman, on the deck, crying again. The man says “What’s wrong, now?” The woman says “I’ve never been kissed before.” So, the man gives her a kiss and walks away.

The next day, the same thing occurs. The man says “Oh, for Christ’s sake! What’s wrong, this time?!” The woman says “Well, I’ve never been f...ed before.” So, the man picks her up, throws her into the ocean, and yells “YOU’RE F...ED!”

Last night I had a dream that I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda. I guess it was just a Fanta sea!

what did one ocean say to the other ocean? nothing, they just WAVED. can you SEA what i did there? im SHORE you did. Why are you so SALTY? dont be a BEACH.

Why was the ocean so blue? Because the island never waved back.

What is the most popular fish in the ocean? A star fish

i had a dream about the whole ocean was filled with orange soda

turns out it was a fanta sea

Have you heard about the lemming that jumped off a cliff into an ocean?

I heard it was because of pier pressure.

what did the ocean say to the other ocean. nothing he just WAVED. did you SEA what I did there. GUY: yes are you SHORE

I was cooking eggs the other day. It was very EGGxiting, all though, I was EGGxaggerating, but, if you think that wasn’t funny to you, then your hard boiled, that’s all for today YOLKS, so I said before several cats starting fighting, that sht was a CATastrophe, these kittens were all like “You’ve gotta be KITTEN me.” Mean while, in the ocean, they just waved, SEA what I did there? You SHORE you didn’t? Oh, alright, that’s okay bud- I guess these ocean puns are too DEEP for you. No? Okay- but, you know why the skeleton was lonely, eh? Oh, cause he had NO BODY. Why didn’t the skeleton ask the girl out? He didn’t have the guts. What did the skeleton do to his gf? He BNED her. No? Alright. Those didn’t make you laugh? Maybe I should hit your funny bone.

What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches? – A nervous wreck.

What did the ocean say to the other ocean?

Nothing, it just waved

Why did the octopus blush?

He saw the bottom of the ocean.

I had a dream of swimming in an ocean of orange soda guess it is just a FANTAsea.

no one wanted to hear my ocean puns, they said they were too fishy.

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? Matt

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? Bob

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves? Russel

Maybe the Ocean is salty because the land never waves back

What did the sand say when it got into a fight with the ocean?

“oh my God, you’re such a beach”

What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches? A nervous wreck

Why don’t oysters give to charity?… Because they’re shellfish😂

I drew a picture of a whale in the ocean. My brother asked what you drawing? I saod you taking a shower.

What did the two oceans say to eachother?

Nothing. They just waved.

The ocean didn’t start smelling like fish until women started swimming in it.

The titanic was going through the ocean. Chuck Norris was on the ship and they never crashed into an iceberg, he just shat off the front of the ship

What do you call a cripple with no arms or legs waiting outside your front door Matt The same guy guy in public park Art Same guy floating in the ocean Bob

By using this site, you agree to its use of cookies. Read more