Stop joking about Helen Keller so much! It’s rude, poor woman! You all just wait till she hears about this!
I usually hang up Halloween decorations,
but this year I'm gonna be the decoration.
What did the white baby say to his Chinese parents?
"Two wongs don’t make a white."
Q: What do you call a rich Asian? A: Dr.
Your momma is so old she has been a waitress at the last supper.
My mom has a toy that I see all the girls and guys seem to play with, and the toy is between my mom's legs.
Roses are red. The sun isn't shining. My mental state is rapidly declining.
Communism is actually kinda tight.
My dog is a genius... I asked him what is two minus two, he said nothing.
Three years ago my doctor told me I was going deaf. I haven't heard from him since.
"A dyslexic atheist lies awake at night wondering if there really is a Dog."
"Did you hear about the worst zoo in the world? It only had one dog in it. It was a Shih Tzu."
"What do you give a man that has everything? Penicillin."
What do Christians and gays have in common?
They both say, “Oh God” when they get on their knees.
What stresses a baby strawberry out?
When its mom is in a jam.
When does a computer function best? When it listens to its motherboard.
What do alien moms like to drink? Starbucks.
How do crabs honor their mom’s birthday? The shell-abrate.
What do you call a mom that can’t draw? Tracy.
How did the digital clock show off to its mother?
Look, Ma, no hands!
