Short jokes
Why are gay men better than straight women?
Because gay men are more willing to look after kids once they swallow them.
What gun isn’t allowed in Africa? A water gun.
What sits at the bottom of the sea and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
If you don’t know the difference between their, there, and they’re, then you're an idiot.
WOW this ultra realistic jenga is awesome!🔥🔥
Ralphie: They put drugs in our medication?
Me: The medication is the drugs.
What’s worse than spiders on your piano?
Crabs on your organ!
How do you disrespect an Asian?
Give them driving lessons.
Doctor: What is your zodiac sign?
Patient: Cancer, why?
Doctor: What are the chances?
Patient: Of what?
Americans: I will cook the pizza.
Italians: I cooka de pizza!
All these people on here making me wish I knew them IRL.
One reason I like to tell riddles is because they help with critical thinking skills.
When baseball players want to get together, what will they do?
Touch base.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, In every step you take, My support stays true.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, When life gets tough, I'll stand by you.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, In your eyes' reflection, My dreams come true.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Like petals in the wind, My heart dances for you.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your laughter's melody, Makes my world anew.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, In your presence, my love, Every moment feels new.
Whenever I order coffee, I always get the depresso with extra depresso sauce.