Sex Jokes

what does the sign say on the hooker house say afterwards they were on lockdown? A. We're on lockdown get lost pervert.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Bad handjobs are rare. They’re hard to come by

So I saw a bag full children near a dumpster, I guess we know where the Orphans are when the parents didn’t want them..

Wouldn’t want to hope a Catholic Priest comes along, otherwise the Priest will have new sex toys..

I’d make a joke about prostitutes and women sleeping with multiple men, but it would just be whore-ible

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

What did the banana say to the vibrator? Why are you shaking? She’s gonna eat me!

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

How do the men with bisexual tendencies that are members in the Kingdom Hall of Jehovah's Witnesses have sex with other men without being disfellowship in the Jehovah's Witnesses Church anonymous sex at a glory hole inside the men's restroom at a gay bar

"I'd rather go through the pain of childbirth again than let you drill in my mouth,"the woman told her dentist. He replied, "Well, please make up your mind so I can adjust my chair."

hey you down to fuck? no i’m just down

Young Couple gets banned from church.

There were three couples, one elderly, one middle aged, and one newlywed, that wanted to join a church. So the minister tells them that in order to be members they must abstain from sex for two whole weeks.

After two weeks, the minister asks the elderly couple if they had abstained. "Yes, no problem!"So the minister welcomes them to the church.

Then he asks the middle aged couple the same question "Well, after one week, the husband had to sleep on the couch, but we made it!" So the minister welcomes them to the church.

Then the minister asks the newlywed couple if they had abstained from sex for two weeks.

"We were unable to abstain. On the third day, my wife dropped a can of corn and when she bent over to pick it up, LUST and PASSION overcame me! I took her right there."

"I'm sorry," the minister says, "but you are both banned from this church!"

"We understand," says the husband, "We were banned from the grocery store, too."