Sex

Sex jokes

Feminist

Why don't feminists like to eat hotdogs? Because they remind them of men's dicks.

Dick

Roses are red, violets are blue. I'm stroking my dick and thinking of you.

Sausage

What is the definition of African-American Vienna sausages?

cocks of African-American men

Shooting Range

What's the difference between an American school and a shooting range?

My dick doesn't get hard at the shooting range.

Memes

Necrophilia

So, a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex.

When he gets to the bar, he brags about the different sex positions they used, and one of the guys says, "Oh, did you do head?"

He responded with, "No, I couldn't find the head."

Tire

What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?

One's a good year, and one's a great year.

Speed Limit

What’s the speed limit in bed?

It’s 68. Once you hit 69, you have to turn back around.

Whore

If having sex for money makes you a wh*re, then what does having sex for free make you?

Non-profit wh*reganisation.

Feminist

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to change the bulb and one to suck my dick.

Woman

What do women and KFC have in common?

After you get done with the thighs and breasts, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.

Old Person

Why don’t old people have sex?

When was the last time you tried pulling apart a grilled cheese that old?

Dad

I asked my Dad the other day, "At what age is it okay to have sex with girls?"

He replied, "When they leave school, son, they are legal."

Apparently, 3:15 p.m. is not what he meant.