Science jokes
Did you know penguins can fly if you throw them hard enough? Just like children!
Yo mama so fat, when she jumps, NASA says a meteor hits Earth.
How do you kidnap Stephen Hawking?
Shut off his computer.
I love Steven Hawking’s stand-up comedy!
What do / and \ have in common?
They have different results.
Yo mama so ugly, she the real reason all the dodos died.
What did the skeleton pull out from behind his ear?
Nothing. Skeletons don’t have ears.
What do you call a body without a nose?
Nobody knows.
Stephen Hawking was a bit of a hardcase. He didn't let people push him around.
Wipe your feet before entering, but in Stephen Hawking's case, it is "Wipe your wheels."
At least he always has a shoulder to cry on.
What does it say on Stephen Hawking's headstone?
R. I. P. Roll in Peace.
Your forehead is sooo big, NASA thought it was Mars!
Oh dear, I made a backwards ray. Let's test it. I made a backwards ray, let's test it oh.
What’s Stephen Hawking’s favorite food?
His left shoulder.
If Stephen Hawking was a boxer, he would roll with the punches.
Stephen Hawking is to wheelchairs like Uncle Ben is to rice.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite line in Rambo?
"Don't push me."
Why is he called Stephen Hawking?
Because he is always trying to hawk up phlegm to clear his throat.
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and his wheelchair?
At least his wheelchair can pull a woman.