Science jokes
I'm really worried for Stephen Hawking, 'cause how is he going to climb the stairway to Heaven?
What was Stephen Hawking's least favorite invention? The walkie-talkie.
Most of us have been somewhere Stephen Hawking hasn’t: Upstairs.
What did one cell say to his sister when she stepped on his toe? Mitosis!
What sound did Stephen Hawking make when he died? Power off.
Science gets you to the moon.
Religion flies you into buildings.
When you're sitting by the mushrooms and you hear one say to the other "Hey, you're a fun guy."
What’s Stephen Hawkins favourite shampoo and conditioner?
Head and shoulders.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
Error, error, error.
System shutting down.
So Stephen Hawking walks into a bar...
Latest news: a new planet has appeared close to Uranus.
What did Stephen Hawking's computer say when he died?
"ERROR"
A neutron walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a drink?"
The bartender responds, "For you, no charge."
The reason Stephen Hawking died is because he drove too far away from the wall; the cord unplugged.
What do you get when you light Stephen Hawking on fire? A fried PC.
Did you hear that Uranus is cracked?
What do high school kids and Dow have in common? They both test chemicals.
It was not a hijack, it was Stephen Hawking.
Q: What did one atom say to the other?
A: I have my ion you.
What's an astronaut's favorite game? Space-ball!