Science jokes
What was Stephen Hawking's shampoo?
Head and Shoulders.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire? Hot wheels!
What's white as snow within 15-25 mins after death and then black and blue and red all over?
A corpse, of course!
Who's never the last man standing?
Stephen Hawking.
If Stephen Hawking got into a fight, he could not stand up for himself.
I tried to catch fog, but I mist.
Why did Steven Hawking go to hell?
Because there is a stairway to heaven.
Stephen Hawking has enough money to stand up, but can’t grab the money.
Why did people bully Steven Hawking?
Because he couldn't stand up for himself.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite lunch? Eggs and shoulders.
If I looked like Stephen Hawking, I would also be an atheist.
What did the cell say when his sister stepped on his foot?
Mitosis!!! (my-toe-sis)
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo? Head and Shoulders.
I heard he's doing a revival tour next month. It's called "Stephen Hawking Unplugged."
A neutron walks into a bar and asks, "How much for a beer?"
The bartender replies, "For you? No charge!"
Q: Why did the flat earther become gay?
A: He knows a thing or two about giving dome.
Q: Why did he eventually become asexual?
A: He doesn't believe in anything south of the border.
Don't trust an atom. They're stupid!
Sixteen Sodium particles walk into a bar, followed by Batman.
Why does Stephen Hawking have the voice of an angel?
Because no one has ever heard an angel talk.
Why is the Moon red today?
The reason why the Moon takes on a reddish color during totality is a phenomenon called Rayleigh scattering. It is the same mechanism responsible for causing colorful sunrises and sunsets, and for the sky to look blue.