( Guy 1: Why my cat’s so angry ? ) ( Guy 2: Because she wants to eat your big sausage ) ( Guy 1: Don’t you ? ) ( Guy 2: Yeah it seems delicious ) ( Guy 1: Mmm so … w-wait what are you doing ? I didn’t think you mean the one in my lunch :< where are you leaving ## ) Meow … ( Guy 1: Shut up i will never feed you this sausage it’s not for you :< -- </3 )
3 construction workers where sitting on the bridge that they where building having their lunch break. The first guy says “If I get a vegimite sandwich again I am going to jump off this bridge.” The second guys says “If get a peanut butter sandwich again I am going to jump off this bridge”. The third guy says if I get another strawberry jam sandwich then I am going to jump off this bridge.” The next day the first guy gets a vegimite sandwich, the second guy gets a peanut butter sandwich and the third guy gets a strawberry jam sandwich. All 3 guys jump of the bridge and die. The next day at their funerals the first wife says “If he just told me I would have given him a different sandwich.” The second guys wife says “It is all my fault. If only I knew.” The third wife says “I don’t get it, he makes his own lunch.”
Today, my mother was making breakfast. As she was tired, my brother asked if there was anything to do today. She responded with a list: -take out the trash -clean your room -Make lunch and be sure to butter the electrical sockets. That’s all sweetie! Explain= You can’t butter a electrical socket
three guys walk into a room where a man is sitting with an assortment of foods on his plate cause it’s lunch time the guys ask the man to do a favor and he says sorry guys I have a lot on my plate!
3 men where in a desert 1 man was holding a jug the 2nd was holding a paper bag and the last was holding a car door a man came around and asked the 1st why he had a jug he said it was his water and if he got thirsty he would take a drink. Then he asked the second why do you have a paper bag the guy said this is my packed lunch so if I get hungry I will eat my lunch. Then he asked the last man why he has a car door and he said it he got hot he would roll down the window.
My “overweight” friend and me were talking at lunch.
Overweight friend: Man, why you so ugly dude?
Me: annoyedJason when you stepped on the scale this morning it asked for you’re weight not you’re phone number.
wyatt is a guy who still doesn’t have a girlfriend because he didnt sit with yanely and jasmine at lunch. funny joke huh