Science jokes
Mitosis!!!!!! >:)
RIP boiled water.
You will be mist.
Why is it hard having a relationship with an astronaut?
Because they are always so distant. :-]
I heard oxygen and magnesium were dating, and I was like, "OMg!"
Q: Why are medication pills white?
A: Because they work.
Memes
intelgent
There were 3 blonde scientists...wait that’s not the joke. The first one said “we are going to pilot the first unmanned spacecraft to land on the sun.”
The second one said “but we can’t do that - if we get within 5 feet of the sun we’ll freeze to death!”
The third blonde says “so we go at night.”
What did Stephen Hawking get for his B-Day?
Chocolate arm.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite song?
"Highway to Hell."
Yo mama's so fat that Jane Goodall couldn't tell if she was a chimpanzee or a human being.
What do you call the closest plant to the sun? The hot ball.
A feather and a depressed boy fell at the same time, which one hits the ground first?
The feather, because the rope stopped the child.
Why is Saturn richer than other planets?
It has a ring!
Why did the sun go to school? To get brighter!
Q: How did the skeleton know it would rain? A: He read the weather forecast.
How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
It only takes one, but it takes a long time, and the light bulb has to want to change.
Why don't you act like an amoeba and split?
Are you made of Gallium and Yttrium?
Because you are looking a little bit GaY.
A neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. When the neutron gets his drink, he asks, "Bartender, how much do I owe you?"
The bartender replies, "For you, neutron, no charge."
What dinosaur loves music?
The velociRAPtor!
Why did the cumulonimbus not show up for work?
Because it was on strike.