What did the sun say to the Earth?
"Am I hot?"
"Wheel" all miss him, right?
I’m reading a book about Anti-Gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
Want to know why some astronomers are gay?
It’s because they want to be in Uranus.
I was boiling some water and said, "Water, you will be mist!"
Uranus is a gas giant.
What's the definition of total chaos?
A bus load of retards passing a magnet factory.
What do you call dogs dressed as dinosaurs?
Jurassic Bark!
How many people does it take to change a lightbulb underwater? The results are shocking!
The one thing I love about Steven is he stood up for all of his haters. Just kidding!
Stephen Hawking's not dead, he is just in airplane mode.
Why do basketball players hate gravity?
Because it's always bringing them down.
Why don't ants get sick?
Because they have anty-bodies.
Why couldn't Stephen Hawking pass? Because he couldn't pass "I'm not a robot" test.
What comes up on small oceans? Microwaves.
1 "Knock knock."
2 "Who's there?"
1 "Interrupting physicist."
2 "Interrupting who?"
1 "Muon!!!"
What did the koala do when he was too educated?
He ran away from koalapidia.
Stephen Hawking walks into a bar, just kidding.
A twelve-volt battery walks into a tavern and orders a drink. The bartender serves him, and comments, "Now don't start anything."
What day does Venus like?
SATURNday.
