I asked my boyfriend who his favorite motivational speaker was. He said Andrew Tate. I told him the BEST motivational speaker was Stephen Hawking.
Science Jokes
What do high school kids and Dow have in common? They both test chemicals.
What sound did Stephen Hawking make when he died? Power off.
Why do orphans hate mitosis cells?
They have parents.
What did the bones on the moon tell the astronaut?
The cow never made it.
Popcorn means Photo-Oxidant formation by Plant-emitted Compounds and OH Radicals in Northeastern Germany.
HO means a woman, in particular one who has many casual fricking encounters or relationships. So basically, popcorn is a woman in plant based frick chamber in a nazi camp.
What do whales use to rub out a mistake in their homework? Their blubber.
Why are Amoebas so bad at math?
Because, when they need to multiply, they divide.
I wondered as the rock in the sky got bigger and bigger, then it hit the bottom of the Earth, and... "explosion!"
What kind of fish knows math?
An anglerfish LOL
NASA called me and they said they reached your hairline.
A piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner.
"Oh, Bunsen, my flame," the sodium swooned. "I melt whenever I see you!"
The Bunsen burner replied, "Calm down. It's just a phase you're going through."
Stephen Hawking is better than NASA. They study black holes that are 8 billion years old, while he was down here on Earth staring at 14-year-old black holes. 😈😈😈
TV: Water found on Mars...
Mars: 1
Africa: 0
How do you embarrass an archaeologist?
Give him a tampon and ask him what period it came from.
Me explaining my child: when your mom is sitting on a table during her period, it's called the periodic table.
I’m not a weatherman, but I’m expecting a few more inches tonight.
Today my biology teacher asked me what's commonly found in a cell......... And apparently "black people" isn't the right answer.
AP Chemistry.
Mitosis!!!!!! >:)