Science jokes
Why is Saturn richer than other planets?
It has a ring!
What dinosaur loves music?
The velociRAPtor!
Why did the cumulonimbus not show up for work?
Because it was on strike.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
His core i5 Overheated. XD
What’s the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can’t hear an enzyme.
Are you made of Gallium and Yttrium?
Because you are looking a little bit GaY.
Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "Can I have a drink of H2O?" Then the second says, "Can I have a drink of H2O2?" and he dies.
A neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. When the neutron gets his drink, he asks, "Bartender, how much do I owe you?"
The bartender replies, "For you, neutron, no charge."
Why did Stephen Hawking die? ... Because he pressed "shut down" instead of "sleep."
Q: How did the skeleton know it would rain? A: He read the weather forecast.
Why don't you act like an amoeba and split?
How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
It only takes one, but it takes a long time, and the light bulb has to want to change.
I didn’t know Stephen Hawking died. Oh god, it must have been when I disconnected the Wi-Fi!
I told a chemistry joke. There was no reaction.
When I went to heaven, I saw Steven Hawking standing there. I asked why he isn’t in heaven yet. He said there are stairs.
How can you tell an anti-vaccine kid?
It's only got 10 hours to live.
An assassin threatens a planet.
The planet remains calm.
The assassin: "Do you not realize the gravity of this situation?"
Why don’t they let Stephen Hawking have other electronics around him? Because he will sound staticky.
Two atom soldiers are fighting against an army. One gets shot. He cried out, "I'm hit! I think I've lost an electron!"
"Are you sure?" asks the other.
"I'm positive!"
What do you call Stephen Hawking's toes on fire?
Hot Wheels.