Science jokes
What do you call a nerd in space?
A space nerd.
What does Stephen Hawking have in common with Bill Gates? One stands, the other doesn't.
Your hairline and the universe have one thing in common: they’re yet to be discovered.
Yo mama so fat, when she farts, it's counted as a new gas element.
Yo hairline is so far back that it was there before the Big Bang happened.
Memes
A farmer artificially impregnated a cow. The cow said to another cow, "It's a miracle, I'm pregnant." The other cow said, "That's impossible, it's only us cows in the field, you must be joking." The first cow said, "Nope, I'm serious... no bull!"
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
What's ALS?
(Kids Doing A Science Project.) Kid 1: Did you bring Uranus?
Kid 2: Never leave home without it.
What’s the difference between a dog and a marine biologist?
One wags its tail, and the other tags a whale!
73 Earths can fit in Uranus.
What did George Washington Carver have anything to do with gorillas? It's a little possible, ya dummy!
My son's into astromancy asked me how do stars die, so I told him, "Usually on overdose, son."
Don't trust atoms, people, they make up everything!
What do you call a thirsty girl?
An H2Hoe.
Why is Mercury filled with Beryllium, Gold, and Titanium?
Mercury is Be-Au-Ti-Full!
An acronym for penis is Proton-enhanced nuclear induction spectroscopy. So just remember, the word "nuclear" is part of a penis.
Yo mama is so fat that she is not wrong when she says the world revolves around her.
SCP-173 has breached containment. This is not a joke. Multiple Keter class SCPs have breached containment. This is an XK class event. Evacuate the Earth and solar system. The world is ending!
What did the boy say to his brother at chemistry class?
"Hey BrO!"
Rocks rock and crack!