Science jokes
Fineman, Einstein, and Schrodinger walked into a bar.
Fineman says, "It appears we're inside a joke."
Einstein says, "But only to an observer who saw us walk in simultaneously."
To which Schrodinger says, "If someone's looking through the window, I'm leaving!"
Your mom is as fat as NASA's company.
Global warming is the average of temperature on Earth.
I wonder if Stephen Hawking was an organ donor, because I need new parts for my go-kart.
Yo momma so fat, when she farted the Big Bang occurred.
Memes
How'd the skeleton know it was going to rain? He looked at the weather forecast.
Steven Hawking was so excited for Christmas till he realized he got socks.
Why is Newton not allowed to visit local farms?
The owners know that forces come in pears.
Why are tomatoes red? Because they contain the carotenoid lycopene!
XD RawR woof woof bark bark UwU meowwwww ROFL LMAO LOLOLOOLOLOL KEKW KEKW PEPELASUGH
Why doesn't Newton cut trees in vanilla Minecraft? Because he wants Minecraft to be realistic!
Yo hairline is so far back that it was there before the Big Bang happened.
(Kids Doing A Science Project.) Kid 1: Did you bring Uranus?
Kid 2: Never leave home without it.
What did George Washington Carver have anything to do with gorillas? It's a little possible, ya dummy!
We thought that my mother died in the best way possible, during her sleep.
But when we did an autopsy on her, we saw she actually died in the worst way possible. During the autopsy.
How did the nut study for its test?
It used the inter-nut.
Don't trust atoms, people, they make up everything!
73 Earths can fit in Uranus.
My son's into astromancy asked me how do stars die, so I told him, "Usually on overdose, son."
What do you call a thirsty girl?
An H2Hoe.
Why is Mercury filled with Beryllium, Gold, and Titanium?
Mercury is Be-Au-Ti-Full!