Science jokes
Why doesn't Newton cut trees in vanilla Minecraft? Because he wants Minecraft to be realistic!
Why is Newton not allowed to visit local farms?
The owners know that forces come in pears.
SCP-1540 transforms in-front of a d-class:
D-class: Whoa dude, you’re a wolf!
SCP-1540: A am a were.
What does Stephen Hawking have in common with Bill Gates? One stands, the other doesn't.
Your hairline and the universe have one thing in common: they’re yet to be discovered.
What do you call a nerd in space?
A space nerd.
Yo mama so fat, when she farts, it's counted as a new gas element.
Engineer: I know engineering, and my gut instinct tells me to fix it!
Biologist: I know biology, and your gut instinct is full of shit.
What type of comedy can't Steven Hawking do?
Stand-up comedy.
I tried to catch fog yesterday...
Mist.
My reverse psychologist told me I didn't have it in me to make a recovery.
🏧gvgffgtyuhihihguggu
What do you call a prehistoric crow? Crow-Magnon.
For some reason, quarks sound really strange to me.
Very funny battery joke.
What would the Mandalorian be called if it was made in an aquatic center?
Mandachlorian.
Why didn't the boy want to read "2000 Leagues Under the Sea"?
It was too much pressure.
I tried having a three-way with two physicists, but they couldn't solve the three-body problem.
We thought that my mother died in the best way possible, during her sleep.
But when we did an autopsy on her, we saw she actually died in the worst way possible. During the autopsy.
How did the nut study for its test?
It used the inter-nut.