What’s red, nine inches long, and makes my girlfriend cry every time she sees it?
Her abortion.
I was camping with my buddy, and there was a fire. We were roasting marshmallows, and there was a vine. I tripped on it and went penis first into the fire, and I said, "Well, there goes your children, stupid ass!"
What’s another name for cumming in a woman?
Loading the dishwasher.
Are you a printer? Because you turn my soft copy into a hard copy. Dark..Humor :)
What do you call a boy in your mom?
Your dad.
Uder the sheets.
Under the sheeeets. Me and your mother making your brother.
Under the sheets. Do do do do dododoodoooddododoodo.
SEX KIDS FUCKING VIRGINS
What’s red, slimy, and makes my wife scream? Two failed abortions!
Q: How do you deliver an autistic baby?
A: A clothes hanger.
Do you know how babies are made? The boy puts his penis in the girl's butt and goes up and down for ten minutes. Then the girl takes a pregnancy test, and if it says no, then you keep doing it until she is pregnant.
The boy will lick the girl down there, and she will put his penis in her mouth and suck it. Then he will spit on his hand and rub it on her boobs and lick/suck them.
How do you know if a black lady’s pregnant?
You put a banana up her vagina and see if any little monkeys come and get it.
What's better than throwing up a stillborn?
Making your wife eat it again.
How do you have sex? You take off your clothes and shove your dick in the girl's pussy. If girl suck his dick.
A dog meets a cat. The cat is black and the dog is white. They have sex on site, no cap.
My abortion.
Why did the failed abortion climb up the woman’s leg?
It was homesick.
How can a man make the world safer?
By having the chop.
Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
Eggs don’t cum.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to catch some pail of water.
Jack came down, and then Jill came tumbling after, so they had a baby...
Dear uncle, I want my condoms.
Q. What do you say when your friend has an abortion?
A. May your baby rest in pieces.
