Fertility jokes

Why couldn’t the dwarf husband make his wife pregnant?

Because of his short cummings.

How can you tell if you have a high sperm count? When your girlfriend has to chew before she swallows.

Wanted: Sperm donors. Please come quickly!

A woman went into her garden and danced in front of her vegetables.

The next morning, her corn didn’t grow, and the tomatoes didn’t blush or turn red, but the cucumbers grew four inches.

What do you call a dead black plantation worker? Fertilizer.

You want to get her pregnant before marriage to know if she's fertile, so why not marry a single mother that already has proof?

What if plants are farming us, giving us oxygen until we die, and turn into natural fertilizer which helps them?

Some sperm arrive in the uterus and see that the egg is already fertilized. They complain that they lost the race and have nothing to do but die.

One speaks up and says he isn't angry, and the others ask why.

"He thought he was going to be alive," the sperm says. "This chick works at an abortion clinic."

By the way, infertility is hereditary:

If your parents did not have children, you will not have any.

If your parents never had children, chances are, you won't either.

Eugenics is Hitler-like and, more importantly, feminist thinking.

Have you ever noticed when a woman is pregnant all her friends touch her stomach and say “congrats,” but none of them touch the man’s penis and say “well done?”

Repost

How do you know if you have a high sperm count?

She chews before she swallows.