What does a burnt pizza, cold beer, and a pregnant woman have in common?
Someone didn’t pull it out in time.
Reproduction Jokes
How do you get a slag from Dundee pregnant?
Spunk in the gutter and let the flies do the work...
I should probably stop making abortion jokes.
After all, the aborted babies aren't laughing.
Yo mama so slutty the abortion clinic gave her a loyalty card and coupon for 20% off her next abortion.
I love you, Explain Bear. Please bear my children.
Why isn't there a pregnant Barbie doll?
Ken came in another box.
If her internal clock can tick, she can sit on my dick.
What’s the best part of having sex with a pregnant woman?
You can have sex and a blow job at the same time.
Your gene pool is more like a gene puddle.
I'd tell a bad baby joke, but I decided to abort.
A genealogist looks at the family tree.
A gynecologist looks up the family bush.
What does a pregnant slave and a payless sale have in common?
Buy one, get one free.
What’s 9 inches long and makes my girlfriend scream?
One inch and put it in her. Her miscarriage.
Why do people hate abortion jokes?
It leaves you with an empty feeling inside.
My son caught me masturbating the other day and was like, "Dad, what are you doing?" I said, "Don't worry, you'll be doing it soon." He said, "Why is that?" I told him, "My arm is getting tired."
What does a pregnant slave and a "pay less" sale have in common?
Buy one, get one free.
I used to be a baker, but I decided to quit my job and stick my dough inside WOMEN’S bakeries.
Scientists have proven that there are two things in the air that have been known to cause women to get pregnant: their legs.
Q. What do you say when your friend has an abortion?
A. May your baby rest in pieces.
What's the most embarrassing thing about locking your keys in the car outside a pregnancy care center?
Having to go inside and ask for a coat hanger.