I was stark nude. Hehe, I was. I truly and sincerely was.
The nurses giggled and said, "Joseph, why the hell is your wiener so loving?"
My penis purred and stroked their hands. I laughed and said, "I do not know."
Relationship Jokes
What has two legs, two arms, one dead and covered in red?
My ex-wife.
What borders on stupidity?
Scotland and the EU.
Does it make me gay if I kiss your dad and he decides to drill my ass?
What's the difference between my wife and her sisters?
Her sisters ate hotter, and I married the grenade.
America and UK are a joke.
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family photo.
Ur dad is gay!
Omg! I didn't mean that. Please don't tell ur mom.
I'm so so so sry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
A guy says to his dog, "Where are you?" The dog was actually dead, bro.
Why can't an orphan be gay?
They have no one to call daddy.
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they don't have anyone to call "daddy."
The woman said stop, but the man kept going, so the wife just kept fucking.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to get to the house. They turned the lights out. Jill shouts, "It's a dildo, WTF?"
My gf told me she was pregnant. So I punched her in the stomach.
She asked me "Why the hell did you do that?!?!?" "I wanted to let you know I'm pro abortion."
I asked my dad what his previous job was. He said: "I was a post until I met your mother."
Your mom is hot.
Teacher: Can someone tell me the only living thing that can reproduce without sex?
Little Johnny: "Your wife."
I fell in love with my teacher.
Which is weird because I am home schooled.
What does a man masturbating and a mayo bottle have in common?
They can both squirt out their cum.
I wish my ex-wife would take me back. :(
