Relationship jokes

I dated a girl, and I didn’t know she was previously in an abusive relationship.

I thought she just REALLY hated high-fives.

Why doesn’t my bully get a dad joke? Oh, ya, ummm...

What's the difference between me and you?

I leave white stains in your mom's bed, and you leave white stains in my mom's bed!

Like and comment if you will be my friend!

Rapboat has to drug his own drink to get laid.

Why don't butts get along?

Because they can't stand each other's cheek!

What do you get when you cross a butt with a phone?

A booty call.

Your mom's been giving me attitude lately, so I told her to shut her mouth. When she did, it caused me to lose 4 inches.

If you've spent less time inside your mother than your father has, you just might be from Alabama!

My cousin really loves baseball.

He always brags about how many home runs he hit in the minors.

Tell your mom happy last night. 🍆 in my bed.

What did Goodlife Fitness say to LA Fitness? "I guess it's just not 'working out'!"

After all these walkers, you still walk over me.

Mr. and Mrs. Potato were walking down the street when a french fry caught the attention of Mr. Potato.

Mrs. Potato said: "I see you eye-balling that French girl!"

When someone pops up in your life making you all happy, you be like, "Who sent you?"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The third one's for you.

"You suck. I don't wanna be married anymore ://////"

What do you call mo on a dating website? Tissue face.

Your momma!

I wanted to have sex, but I share a room with my brother, so we made a code. "Tomato" for faster, and "cheese" for more, and I shouted, "Tomato, tomato, cheese, cheese." My brother said, "Stop making sandwiches, you're getting mayo on my bed!"