Relationship jokes

Kiss a girl on the forehead make her happy for a day.

If you give her anal you'll make her whole weak.

Your hairline and my grandpa go way back.

EVERYONE:

"My boyfriend, Danny, broke up with me. Can some hot guy come, so I can interview them and see if they wanna date me?"

Knock knock, Who's there? Dad. You came back?

A happy little girl was running on the grass. She saw two gay guys kissing in a blank space, and she started crying. The two gay guys heard her crying, and then they asked her: "Why are you crying?" The little girl answered: "This is the first time I see an unnatural nature."

😂😂😂😂

Who am I rooting for during the Super Bowl? Easy. Taylor Swift.

I just had sex...

I think I nailed it!

(Shit joke, I know.)

Me, trying to interact with people: “Hey, are you a rope? Because I really wanna HANG with you.”

Person I’m talking to: *Pulling out phone to call suicide hotline* “haha what.”

You: Knock knock. Other person: Who is there? You: Not your parents.

My girlfriend told me the dishwasher was leaking, so I brought home some tampons.

A penis has a bad life. His neighbor is an asshole, his friend is a pussy, and his owner beats him.

A boy asked his dad: "Why didn’t you make love with my mom, Daddy?"

Dad: "Because I’m gay."

*Son started making out with his daddy and sucking his daddy’s big peepee.*

Son: "W- Wait a minute. So how did I exist if you didn’t make love with my mom if you’re not straight?"

Dad: "Because you are not real, and I didn’t even have a wife."

The son woke up from his horrible nightmare, and he looked so scared. He did leave his bed to check out his dad, but he didn’t find his dad, until his dad entered the house, and he said to his son: "Why did you look so worried? I’m just bringing some food for breakfast."

Son: "Well, but why are your hands full of cum ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ?"

Dad: "Because I did it with you last night. Did you forget?"

Son: "But it was a nightmare..."

*Dad turns into a monster*

Dad: "I’m your nightmare!"

The son woke up, and he seemed too scared, and he found himself beside his dad torturing him after he discovered he’s gay.

The son with himself: "Wake up, b*tch, wake up, b*tch!!!!!!"

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Got my girlfriend a "get better soon" card. She's not sick, I just think she can do better.

My friend broke his tie. That's a tie breaker.

Why did my dad leave me?

Because I was gay.

What do you do when your man doesn't like fruit jokes?

Let the mango.

Why can't orphans be gay?

Because they got nobody to call "daddy."

You know, the strangest things happen. My mom said, "Step on a crack, you break your mama's back, but if you step on a line, you break your father's spine." I stepped on the line. It didn't break his spine. Mom, who is my father?

Hate me all you want, but I gotta say, this whole thing with Gwen and TJ is ridiculous.

What do you get when you cross mums and makeup?

Beauty!