Punishment jokes
How did the man in prison escape?
He drew a bum on the wall and slid through the crack.
I was walking down the streets of Manchester when suddenly I saw Penaldo getting arrested! I heard the officer say, “This time I give you warning, there will be no penalty.”
That’s when Penaldo asked, “No penalty?!” and punched the police officer.
Shame on you Penaldo!
A priest asks a convicted murderer on the electric chair, "Do you have any last request?"
"Yes," said the murderer, "Will you hold my hand?"
What does a paedophile say when he gets to heaven?
A: Where's the holy baby?
Teacher, what do you call sex making out with a C.I.W.?
Or is she asking her son, "Do you know Newton?"
The boy said, "No, I don't know."
She said to him, "If you had paid attention to your lessons, you would have known him!"
The boy said, "Ok, do you know Ikhlod?"
She said to him, "No, who is she?"
He said to her, "If you had paid attention to your husband, you would have known her."
The important thing is that the boy is currently a week with his uncles and a week with his turbans.
Why should you always give an emo a high five in the hallway? You can’t leave them hanging.
What's a prisoner's favorite game?
Hangman!
God: Who ever kills Hitler will go to heaven.
Hitler: 👌👌👌👌
God: 😩😩😩😩
DARK ALERT********
A girl went to the doctor. The doctor said she had one year to live. She shot the doctor, and the judge gave her 15 years.
DARK ALERT********
Why can’t orphans get in trouble?
Because there’s no one to give a phone call home to.
The Good Old Days.
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.
Why did the teacher get the death penalty? Because she gave an orphan homework. That's on period. #darkhumor
What do you say to someone being cremated? You urned it!
The doctor gave me one year to live, so I shot him. The judge gave me 15 years. Problem solved.
What's the difference between me and a registered sex offender?
I am not registered.
What's a convict's favorite chore?
Weeding.
My doctor said I only have 1 year to live, so I killed him. Got sentenced to life in prison, problem solved!
I wasn't cut out for running today, but those cops came out of nowhere.
When I try to eat, but I hurt my feet. When I using a hoe, but I hurt my toe. When I going to a doctor, but then I get trolled. Oh I just, want to say, what the flip?!!
When I using a copper, but I enveloped by a hopper. When I trying to draw someone, but it ended up with a punishment. When I spit on a bunny, it jumps right on me. Oh I just, want to say, what the flip?!!
When I growing older, someone called me a slacker. When I was 33, I bumped into a tree. When I getting angry, people calls me crazy lady. Oh I just, want to say, what the flip?!!