Punishment jokes
Why did the MOSFET go to jail?
It had a charge for battery.
Leo must be a parking ticket... not because of the “fine” thing, nah, it’s because she’s OVERSTAYED her WELCOME.
When the cannibal was late for dinner, he got the cold shoulder.
Why did the kid get grounded? Because he was always lion.
What do you call a person on fire in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels!
You hear about Rapboats' time in prison? He kept droppin' the soap on purpose.
Sultan Khan was a courtier in Akbar's court. He wanted to make his son the royal treasurer, but his cunning plans always failed.
Sultan Khan thought that Birbal was the cause of his son's misfortune, so he looked for an opportunity to get rid of Birbal. One day, Birbal was late to the emperor's court. Seeing this, Sultan Khan said, "Your Majesty, don't you think that Birbal is taking advantage of his position because he has been late these days?"
"This must be another plan to trap Birbal," said Akbar. So he decided to wait and see what Birbal would do. Akbar sat next to Suman Khan and said, "Yes, he must be punished."
Suman Khan was amazed to see his plan work this time. "From now, you should not agree to anything he says today," Akbar replied, "Agreed."
Soon, Birbal came to court. "Please spare me for being late. My wife was unwell." Akbar immediately said, "No."
Birbal was surprised. He tried again by saying, "But that's the truth. Please believe me." Again, Akbar replied, "No."
"There must be something going on," thought Birbal to himself. Then he asked, "Can we discuss important matters today?" Akbar immediately replied, "No, we will not."
"Then may I go home?" asked Birbal. Akbar said, "No, you will stay here this evening," said Akbar, enjoying himself. Birbal understood what was happening.
"Oh, so this is my game. The emperor is saying no to all my questions." He looked around and saw Suman Khan smiling, seeing him in trouble. "This must be his idea. Let me teach him a lesson."
The clever Birbal thought to Akbar, "Very well," he said. "But I have a last request. Will you please listen to me?" Akbar saw what Birbal had done.
He was very pleased and called loudly, "No, I will not listen to you." That is all Birbal said before returning to his seat. Suman Khan was stunned and angry, and Birbal had outwitted him, so he could not make his son the treasurer.
I got detention yesterday because I told the emo kid to "Hang in there."
How do homeless people punish their children?
What are their children going to do? Go to their room?
You are getting Cole for Christmas, you shit fuckers.
I'd hit you, but I don't want to go to jail for animal abuse.
Today I saw my son lick out a tub of butter. I told him to make a sandwich without butter for a week (as a punishment). He said, "Okay," and licked the bread. "It's really easy to spread," he said. LOL!
When I see the little brother in a video get everything, I try it and get grounded ;-;
Did you hear about the two burglars that stole a calendar?
I hear they got six months each.
What happens when a pun isn’t funny?
It gets PUNished.
What do you call a man with no legs?
Hangman.
About to go on a date.
But she was late.
So I got some tape.
And eventually punished her with rape.
My mom said, "Take out the trash," and I said, "Okay." The next day she asked, "Where is your sister?" and I said, "In line to get crushed."
How do you punish a blind kid?
Rearrange the furniture.
How does a blonde punish her blind son? She takes away his TV privileges.
How does a blonde punish her deaf son? She takes away his telephone privileges.
How does a blonde punish her paraplegic son? She gives him a spanking.