Ritch

What's the point in staying alive if you're a piece of shit, failure at everything, rejected, forever unwanted, always been alone and know I will always be alone until I die which will never be soon enough and that's the worst thing living life when you already have so much hate for yourself then compounding it with knowing that you're unlovable, the worst ugliest and evil people still had someone that loved them so I must be worse, a woman would rather be with a ugly, disrespectful belittling cheater than with someone that would treat them good, I can't even get one, I'm 31 being alone it's the worst feeling there is, but sadly I understand nothing I do or will ever do it would be ever good enough no amount of money nothing I'm such a failure I can't even kill myself something I wish forever because I know for next 40 or 50 years I'm going to live in the worst torture you can think of hell I wish I was being physically tortured.

I don't think it'll be that bad it's sadly it's only getting worse it's so bad I don't even have really anyone to even talk to I live at home alone and don't even have any pets, so I suppose the whole joke is there is no God and this just proves it more like Satan cuz that's the only person I can think of that will do this to someone make him see everyday just how unwanted he really is but no all I get is to watch people together and know that it will never happen for me, I can't even get up the courage to end my life cuz I'm that much of a coward and a b****, why do I have to be in healthy shape I wish that I wasn't I wish that I had cancer just so I can die more so I never asked to be here I wish there was a way that I could just give my life to someone else someone that deserves it because I know I will never be happy but one thing is looking up because I always thought that was going to have to endure all of this pain and misery and rejection and being alone until I die 30 40 50 years from now however I feel it's going to be a lot sooner soon very soon and I'm looking forward to it I feel it I feel something bad is going to happen but then again wouldn't it be something good technically anyway maybe God has been listening don't believe there's one anyway but maybe my prayers are finally being answered since I was 10 all I've ever wanted was two things to someone to love me and to die because I knew the first one would never happen and being alive is not worth it.

31 years old and I hate myself more than anything in the world so if they are people out there who believe in god pray to him to end my suffering because he doesn't want to listen to me who could blame him sorry it was long joke and if you don't know what the joke was it's simple MY LIFE.

I asked a girl I met if I could take her out to dinner.

The joke is I knew right after she said, "I'll call you," she was lying to me, not surprised even a little.

The next joke was a part of me hoped she would call, but did I really think she was going to? I'll never be good enough for anyone, what was I thinking, why did I even bother to ask her in the first place? I think it was just to prove I was right, I'm unwanted.

LONELINESS EQUALS SADNESS.

Aloneness is not the joke, it's unfortunately my reality.

I think I found the worst joke in life. For me, it's that I have always been unwanted and alone for my whole life, and I've never even been in a relationship with anyone, and I'm 31 years old, and I also know that deep down, I'm always going to be alone and unhappy. All I get out of life is seeing everyone else with someone and knowing it will never happen for me. I think that's the worst joke I can think of... LIFE.

Still living when you know you'll never find someone to be with.

I apologize with the wording to this; it's another thing I am a failure at.

Feel free to comment.

I've got not much of anything to be honest Been in special classes in school Not liked by people Only relationship I've ever had and she cheated on me 31 years old and never had sex pathetic Not very smart Don't look good Hate myself more than anything Been a failure at everything in life Probably be alone forever People treat me like crap Can't do anything right And the list goes on and on

So the question is why haven't I killed myself yet the answer is ,I forget I'm a extreme procrastinator keep just putting it off because I'll probably just fuck it up anyway

People always often say to someone who are thinking about suicide that's the easy way out. Don't give up! All I say is I'm not giving up, just I'm giving in, and does it really seem like it's the easiest way out? I don't think so, it's probably the hardest if you ask me, or I would have done it already, but someone's got to do it.

I've always been suicidal. Some might say, "Why haven't I actually done the act?" I'll just say, well, I hate myself too much so I thought I'd stay around for the punishment of staying alive.

How sad and pathetic is it that all you wait for after you finish a suicidal joke it for people to like your joke ,but you know you'll just be a failure at that as well,

What's the worst thing about committing suicide? You can only do it once.

What's the only regret you would have when you eventually kill yourself? It wasn't sooner.