Pool

Pool Jokes

I was swimming in a pool on my vacation when a fan of mine approached me. He said he wanted an autograph and gave me a pen to sign it. I accidentally dropped the pen in the pool. Suddenly Penaldo came out of NOWHERE and dived to save it, he said he always dives for pens.

POV: Wine Taster in hell

I was, sitting with the best wine ever made on the table in front of me. this silhouette begins to speak, "you have risen to be the most superb Wine Taster on Earth. then you got run over by a truck hauling freshly made wine to a warehouse. your crimes are as follows: you left your high school prom date with another man after you got her pregnant, you let your mother believe that the cat ran away after you drowned it in the pool, and you never got married. how do you plead?" the man looked at the silhouette like it was a purple rabbit. "guilty," said the man, "but if you would be so kind would you at least tell me what the wine in front of me tastes and smells like I will take any punishment you deem fit." very well," said the silhouette, "but you will regret that request." out of the shadows comes a boy only looking 19 years old. the boy says "I will you taster today. I am confident about my sense of taste." the boy takes the first bottle and opens it, pours it into a wine glass, and swirls it around. He then takes a sniff and begins to drink, to the Wine Taster he says, "Mmmm, Taste like chicken."

I heard a neat little trick you can use to have a public pool all to yourself. If you blow a whistle 3 times, everyone will just get out!

3 friends go to a water park and meet a genie. “You each get one wish.” “When you get to the top of the slide you shall scream your wish as you go down.” The first man went down the slide and screamed “COCA COLA” and the pool was fuelled with CocaCola. The next ugly ass looking mf goes down the slide and screams “C-M&MS” as if he wasn’t just about to say cum-then the pool was full of cu-⟟ mean M&Ms. The last horny ass bitch is so excited he says “WEEE!” Then the pool is full of piss. He was upset the pull wasn’t full of Dildos./j

I was in an audition for the lead role of movie 'Aquaman'. The Director told me to dive into a pool. Then outta nowhere Penaldo showed up and made a big dive into the pool. The director was impressed and selected Penaldo for the movie.Shame on you penaldo for destroying my dream

One day a rooster fell into a swimming pool and a cat laughed. And the moral of the story? A wet cock can always satisfy a pussy.

A tortoise was in a dry pool along with some geese tortoise said that they could carry him to a fresh pool then the geese float through the air holding the tortoise the tortoise was about to say something but fell and died

Astronaut In The Ocean-By- Masked Wolf and watersharky Music Productions- Astro-naut What you know about rollin' down in the deep? When your brain goes numb, you can call that mental freeze When these people talk too much, put that shit in slow motion, yeah I feel like an astronaut in the ocean, ayy What you know about rollin' down in the deep? When your brain goes numb, you can call that mental freeze When these people talk too much, put that shit in slow motion, yeah I feel like an astronaut in the ocean She say that I'm cool (damn straight) I'm like "yeah, that's true" (that's true) I believe in G-O-D (ayy) Don't believe in T-H-O-T She keep playing me dumb (play me) I'ma play her for fun (uh-huh) Y'all don't really know my mental Lemme give you the picture like stencil Falling out, in a drought No flow, rain wasn't pouring down (pouring down) See, that pain was all around See, my mode was kinda lounged Didn't know which-which way to turn Flow was cool but I still felt burnt Energy up, you can feel my surge I'ma kill everything like this purge (ayy) Let's just get this straight for a second, I'ma work Even if I don't get paid for progression, I'ma get it (get it) Everything that I do is electric I'ma keep it in a motion, keep it moving like kinetic, ayy (yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah) Put this shit in a frame, better know I don't blame Everything that I say, man I seen you deflate Let me elevate, this ain't a prank Have you walkin' on a plank, la-la-la-la-la, like Both hands together, God, let me pray (now let me pray) Uh, I've been going right, right around, call that relay (Masked Wolf) Pass the baton, back and I'm on Swimming in the pool, Kendrick Lamar, uh Want a piece of this, a piece of mine, my peace a sign Can you please read between the lines? My rhyme's inclined to break your spine They say that I'm so fine You could never match my grind Please do not, not waste my time What you know about rollin' down in the deep? When your brain goes numb, you can call that mental freeze When these people talk too much, put that shit in slow motion, yeah I feel like an astronaut in the ocean, ayy What you know about rollin' down in the deep? When your brain goes numb, you can call that mental freeze When these people talk too much, put that shit in slow motion, yeah I feel like an astronaut in the ocean

How do you get out 500 drunk TTC people? "Ah Antson fire a warning shot." " Uhhh sir its a M92 mortar." " Ah just fire the shot." Please get out before you get triggered from the pool and you have no clothes showing your nono parts. Oh wait please get out of the pool drunk people. Potato potatoes fire ze shot.

How to get 60 translink workers? Please head out of the pool because ya'll are fat. Oh wait didn't you pooped yourself? Say sorry to your underwear while pooping as a fat Canadian translink worker Little boy.