Splash jokes

What is a dry swimmer?

Not in the water...

What does a killer say in the shower in the morning?

- Splish splash, I'm gonna slash...

Do you know the shortest joke about Titanic?

*Splash!*

Adam and Eve were sitting on the beach one day, and Eve says to Adam, "Let's go for a swim." Adam replies, "I'm not in the mood."

She says, "Okay, I will go by myself." She puts her toes in the water and splashes around and says, "The water is beautiful, come in!" Adam replies, "Na, still not in the mood."

Eve wades into the water until she gets to her waist. Adam jumps up and yells at Eve standing waist deep and says, "Oh no, now all the fish are gonna smell like that!"

Do you want to go to the pool?

Yes? Well, water you waiting for?

What do you say to a black midget?

Wanna a shower? You look like you got splashed by a muddy puddle.

When I'm peeing in a toilet I don't pee directly into the water. I pee on the curved part of the bowl beside the water because I figure it splashes less, but when you're peeing that close to the edge, the sporadic tiny offshoots of pee become a greater threat.

I'm not sure if the accumulation of these offshoots is greater than the potential splashback from peeing mid-bowl. It's possible that I'm thinking about this too much, but it's also possible that I'm not thinking about this enough.

Shup up, transparent hairline. Look like you got splashed by some clear soap.

After having a win at bingo, Ethel splashed out on some venison for tea.

During the meal, her daughter asked her mum what it was, to which she replied with a little smile... "It's what I call your father."

Little Jimmy threw down his knife and fork and jumped up sayin', "Oh My God! Don't eat it!!! It's a fucking Dick!"

Three kids one day found a magical slide. There was a sign next to it saying, “Whatever you wish for comes true once you slide down.” One kid stepped up and slid down. He wished for a river of chocolate, thus he swam in a chocolate river.

The second kid slid down and wished for a mountain of money. He then landed in a pile of money. The third kid went down and said, “Weeeeeeee!”

Wanna play shark attack? I eat, you scream!

The Toaster: The best bath bomb!

Be warned, if you are in the shower, I might pikachu and it's not my fault if I see any jigglypuffs.

What did the ocean say when it saw the beach?

Nothing, it just waved.