Perception jokes
Have you ever seen a blind man swim?
Neither has he.
Whenever I go to bed, my wife disappears, but whenever I turn on the lights at night, she’s back in bed.
An Asian went to bed at 9:00, woke up at 6. People say he's still sleeping.
What do a blind person and an orphan have in common?
They both cannot see their family.
What was Helen Keller's favorite color?
Velcro.
If someone calls you dirty minded just say:
"You are dirty minded as well if you understand what I'm saying."
Guy: shows girlfriend his dick.
Girlfriend: "Cool, where is it?"
People say that they can read people's faces; then how come nobody sees me breaking inside?
You're cheap; no one even pays attention.
What do you call an autistic person? Names.
I'm autistic myself, so don't go crying in my comment section.
How many LGBT supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?
The lightbulb is fine the way it is. Society just needs to change the way it looks at it.
So a blind man walks into a bar.
At least he thinks so.
What is blue but smells like red paint?
Blue paint.
The blind person can’t eat fish, it’s “sea food”.
How can you tell Donald Trump is old and demented?
He can't distinguish between tanned people and cockroaches!
I gave my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday. Next week he told me it was the most violent book he ever read.
Dark humor is like water.
Not everybody gets it.
What's the best thing about dating a blind chick?
She can't identify you.
"You da bomb!" "No, you da bomb!"
In the US, a compliment. In the Middle East, an argument.
Dark humor is like sex. Not everyone gets it.