Perception jokes

What was Helen Keller's favorite color?

Velcro.

Whenever I go to bed, my wife disappears, but whenever I turn on the lights at night, she’s back in bed.

People say that they can read people's faces; then how come nobody sees me breaking inside?

You're cheap; no one even pays attention.

What do you call an autistic person? Names.

I'm autistic myself, so don't go crying in my comment section.

So a blind man walks into a bar.

At least he thinks so.

What is blue but smells like red paint?

Blue paint.

The blind person can’t eat fish, it’s “sea food”.

I met another kid with Down syndrome the other day and attempted to talk to him. But my mom showed up and was asking me why I am talking to the mirror.

How can you tell Donald Trump is old and demented?

He can't distinguish between tanned people and cockroaches!

I gave my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday. Next week he told me it was the most violent book he ever read.

90 percent of women kiss with their eyes closed, which is why it's so difficult to identify a rapist.

Dark humor is like water.

Not everybody gets it.

What's the best thing about dating a blind chick?

She can't identify you.

"You da bomb!" "No, you da bomb!"

In the US, a compliment. In the Middle East, an argument.

What is a blind person's favorite color?

Black.

Dark humor is like sex. Not everyone gets it.

How many LGBT supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?

The lightbulb is fine the way it is. Society just needs to change the way it looks at it.

I went up to the blind kid and said, "Can you get that for me?" and he said, "I can't, I'm blind." And so I said, "I see."

Dark humor is like food, not everyone gets it.