Perception jokes

Dark humor is like a dad - not everyone gets it.

You want to know what the ugly truth looks like? Go look in the mirror.

Patient: Doctor, every time I look in a mirror, I feel ill, as if I'm about to throw up. What's wrong with me?

Doctor: I don't know, but your eyesight is perfect.

All trucks are monster trucks if you’re afraid of trucks.

1 minute silence for those who still think thoughts can't kill you.

I have a heart, alright. I just happen to see a mere hollow shell of one coming from you.

Mirrors don't lie, and lucky for you, they don't laugh.

My friend made this joke (so I’m going steal it). I’m surrounded by fat people, oh wait... it’s just one.

You're so skinny, you swallowed a meatball and thought you were pregnant!

Kid asks, "What is dark humor?" Me *points*, "See that guy across the street..." Kid: "I can't... I'm blind." Me: "Exactly."

You wanna see a joke? Look in a mirror.

What do blind people take for granted? Sight.

What do you call staring stares?

Stares.

Your mama is so fat, I had to look twice to get a first impression.

I see some objects over there... oh, never mind, that's a woman.

God said, “Let there be light,” so it beamed off your forehead, and so I turned into Stevie Wonder and called it night.

Déjà Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.

Wanna me to show you a joke?

*Points at face* Funny, right?

What did the guy with no teeth say to a blind guy... "How many fingers am I holding up?"

Sadly, blind jokes are cruel. A kid at my school was punched the other day for being blind.

Sadly, he didn't see it coming.