Perception jokes

Want to see a funny joke? Look in the mirror.

I would like to tell you the name of a song I showed my friend who was on LSD. "I See a Dreamer."

I see 6 letters in "the past."

I have 2020 vision.

I see 7 letters in "the future," I have 2021 vision.

What's the difference between crazy people and regular people?

We don't live in their heads.

Your mom: Your plate is full, that's enough food on your plate.

Me: My plate is not full, I still see the white of the plate.

Yo mama so ugly, she made everybody's face fall off.

Why couldn’t the house see?

The blinds were down.

Did you know that Helen Keller has a swing in her backyard?

Neither did she.

Yo mama's so short, when it rains, she's the last to know!

Bully: You're a loser and fat.

Me: Shut up. The camera thought you were a house.

What's Helen Keller's favorite color?

Corduroy.

Have you heard about the blind man who saw the accident and the dead man who heard it?

I was walking home when I saw children crossing the street on their own. I went towards him and tapped his shoulder and said, "Hey, little kid, you are not supposed to be walking on your own." The kid turns out to be a dwarf.

What is the similarity between an anti-joke and a clown? Neither are funny.

Why are cops worried about drunk drivers and not elderly drivers?

We clap when we see you. We clap our hands over our eyes.

How do you see past that forehead?

When Helen Keller drives a car, people call her Asian.

Kid 1: Words can't describe how ugly you are.

Kid 2: Words can describe how beautiful you are.

Kid 1: Aw, thanks!

Kid 2: But numbers can. 0/10

I'm reading a horror story in Braille. Something bad is about to happen, I can FEEL it!