Perception jokes
What did the guy with no teeth say to a blind guy... "How many fingers am I holding up?"
You know what I saw today? Everything I looked at.
You didn't know that Helen Keller is dead? It's fine; neither does she.
You gotta hand it to blind prostitutes.
Did you see the blind guy trip on a can?
He didn't either.
NORTH INDIANS: Decent, but overrated af. They are the only thing that comes to many ppl's minds when someone says "Indian".
SOUTH INDIANS: Decent, but underrated af. Many ppl don't even know they exist. They are literally asked if they are North Indians.
WEST AND EAST: Decent but underrated af.
When deaf people see someone yawning, do they think they're screaming?
Friend: *hits head* Others: How many fingers am I holding up? Me to friend: How suicidal am I on a scale from one to ten? Friend: Ten Me: He's fine guys.
You can't see me, but when I smile, you can.
When someone has an imaginary friend, you call them weird and crazy.
But when a group of people have an imaginary friend, you call it religion. :)
Why do blind kids like plane crashes?
Because you can’t dislike what you have never seen.
What do you call a blind German? A Nazi (Not-see)!
What part of the Earth does Helen Keller not have?
The sea.
Son: Hey Dad, what's an alcoholic?
Dad: Well son, do you see those 4 cars? An alcoholic would see 8.
Son: Dad, there are only 2 cars.
So a blind man walks into a bar.
At least he thinks so.
A blind woman told her husband someone is coming. He asks how do you know, you can't see. She replies, "I can taste it."
Me: Hey, say I am ugly for a billion pounds.
Them: You're ugly.
Me: Sorry, I am not a mirror.
Did you know Hellen Keller had a doll house in her backyard? Neither did she.
Kid 1: Words can't describe how ugly you are.
Kid 2: Words can describe how beautiful you are.
Kid 1: Aw, thanks!
Kid 2: But numbers can. 0/10
My biggest joke: I’d show you, but I don’t have a mirror to show you.