I went up to the blind kid and said, "Can you get that for me?" and he said, "I can't, I'm blind." And so I said, "I see."
Two blondes walk into a bar. I thought one of them would have seen it.
I asked my friend if they will show me something retarded. He said, "Go look in a mirror." I said, "Thank you."
My young son saw Trump on TV. He asked, "Why is the man on TV painted orange?" I replied, "Son, when Russia pays that much for equipment, they don't want it to rust."
I met another kid with Down syndrome the other day and attempted to talk to him. But my mom showed up and was asking me why I am talking to the mirror.
I see some objects over there... oh, never mind, that's a woman.
When you look at the sun, it's like looking at me.
Did you know that Helen Keller had a dog?
Well, neither did she!
You want to know what the ugly truth looks like?
Go look in the mirror.
What do you call the worst joke ever?
Well, according to my mom, I am.
Today when I looked in the mirror, I stopped and simply said: "It's ok, what's inside matters the most, right?"
If two blind people meet, one of them says: "Long time, no see!"
Did you know Hellen Keller had a doll house in her backyard? Neither did she.
A blind man was walking into a fish market. He took a deep breath and said, “Good morning, ladies!”
Girlfriend: "Would you still love me if I was a figment of your imagination?"
My schizophrenic ass: Of course I would.
Beautiful people should read this quote: "God gave you beauty but not brains."
There was one kid that came home from school and asked his mom what dark humor was.
She said, "Well son, do you see that guy over there across the road? Go give him a high-five."
Son said, "But I can't see."
Mom said, "That's the point."
Husband: Hey honey, words can’t describe how beautiful you are.
Wife: Aww, thanks.
Husband: But numbers can. 0 out of 10.
Your mama so fat, when Pennywise said, "We all float down here," he saw her and suddenly knew he was mistaken.
Guys, stop making jokes about blind people, they might s... never mind, continue.
