Party jokes
Boy, your momma so ugly she’s denied from the homeless parties in the dumpster.
Quiet kid, your momma so funny she made a joke pop out her a*s.
A black n***a crashes a neighborhood barbecue, bragging about his 'hood credentials' while hogging all the ribs and collard greens. The host calls him out, 'Yo, pay up or get out. Ain't no freebies here.' He laughs it off, 'Man, I run this block!' But the host's burly brother, who's been grilling the whole time, snarls, 'Wrong, fool. Time to settle the score.' He pins him against the picnic table, wraps a chain leash around his neck from the dog run, edges him with a vibrating basting brush slathered in hot sauce, and then plows his ass deep and hard, grunting, 'Now you're the main course, spicier than the jerk chicken!'
What is the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean?
I've never had a garbanzo bean on my face for my birthday.
What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?
She choked.
Q: What is the difference between two bottles of Whiskey and 2 pretty feminist girls?
A: You don't leave the bottles in the cold and dark forest after you and your 9 friends are finished with them.
Memes
Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party?
He had nobody to go with.
Why didn't the skeleton go to prom?
He was dead. You fool. You fell for my trick. I'm very heartless.
Oh wait.
You fool!
What happened the night Stephen Hawking came home wasted?
Nothing... wife couldn’t tell.
Yesterday I went to a lightbulb party, and it was lit.
Who hates going to a pizza party?
A weirdough.
Shrek and the Hulk became politicians.
And they created The Green Party.
Today I was asked what I wanted to be, and I said I wanted to be a pinata because I want to be hanged.
Why should you never talk to pie at a party? Because it goes on forever.
What were the candles doing at a birthday party?
Getting lit.
It's quite ironic that people tell you "Happy Birthday," then they want to give you a spanking.
What do old people have when they are sick.
A going away party.
What did the kangaroo 🦘 bring to the cookout?
A jump rope!
What is the most awkward moment when Helen Keller is playing pin the tail on the donkey?
Her friends aren’t sure whether to blindfold her.
I was at a bar. The girl said, "Sex, sex, free sex tonight," when she really said, "663629."
What is a yellow dog Libertarian?
A yellow dog Libertarian is a Libertarian who is blindly loyal to the Libertarian Party, he or she who is a yellow dog Libertarian is a card carrying member of the Libertarian Party who would not vote for a progressive Democrat or a conservative Republican even if their life depended on it! 🐕 🗽