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Why did the guy bring a rope to the party?
Because he wanted to hang out... permanently. ππ
I met a lovely girl at a friend's house party, so I went and introduced myself by saying I'm Noah, what's yours?
She turned around angrily and offended and said, "I identify as a hockey puck, didn't you see the sign?"
To which I replied, "Bitch, that says hickey puck. If you identify as a hockey puck, then let me hit you!"
I met a lovely girl at a friend's house party, so I went and introduced myself by saying I'm Noah, what's yours?
She turned around angrily and offended and said, "I identify as a hockey puck, didn't you see the sign?"
To which I replied, "Bitch, that says hickey puck. If you identify as a hockey puck, then let me hit you!"
Why did the autistic ice cream run away from the party?
She had a meltdown.
On Halloween you better hide your candy, or else there will be a fella named Big Dick Randy.
My mom told me that my friend Paul is coming over, and he is going to sleep over, so I was happy.
The next day, I ask my mom, "Where's the dog?" My mom asks me, "What dog?"
Then I said to my mom, "I heard Paul say, 'Do you want it doggy?' and you said 'Yeah.'"
I told my friend that we should dress up as P. Diddy and Drake for Halloween and ask parents if their kid wants to come over for a sleepover.
How do you know you had a gay cookout?
All the hotdogs taste like ass.
"Yo, Gabriella, any idea where our other friends are?"
Guys, what should I be for Halloween (aka tomorrow)?
Lily, Amy, Natalie, and Gabriella, it's my birthday tomorrow. Please come if you want to come. If you come to the party, there will be snacks and cake. Ty.
House parties are like churches: there's always an underage kid getting fucked somewhere.
What do you call a house party for slaves?
An auction house.
Why is it so cheap to throw a party at a haunted house? Because the ghosts bring all the boos.
What do you call it when a bunch of guys who look the same have an orgy?
A doppelgangbang.
My lesbian neighbors and my sister gave me a Rolex for my birthday. I guess they misunderstood when I said I wanted a watch.
What do you call a Lesbian at a Barbecue? A LGBBQ.
How do you throw a surprise party at the hospital?
Throw a strobe light in the epileptic ward.
Q: What is the difference between two bottles of Whiskey and 2 pretty feminist girls?
A: You don't leave the bottles in the cold and dark forest after you and your 9 friends are finished with them.