Otherness jokes

A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, "Have you heard about the mad cow disease that's going around?"

"Yeah," the other cow says. "Makes me glad I'm a penguin."

A little girl was sitting with some other kids. She thought to herself, "I want to have kids when I'm older, at least they’ll have a home, parents, and hopefully a dad that actually came back with the milk!" 🤣😂

TEST QUESTION: what looks like half an apple?

My cousin: the other half.

I work as an IT technician. The other day, I had to fix Cristiano Ronaldo’s laptop. He pointed to a message on the screen saying, “Do you consent to cookies?” He said that he doesn’t eat cookies and doesn’t know what consent means, so that’s why he called me.

I brought a new pen that can write underwater. It can also write other words.

My grief counselor died just the other day.

He was so good though, I didn't care.

Jesus and Satan are just basically Homer and Flanders. One tries to help the other, only for Satan to just say, "Shut up!"

Two cows are grazing in a field.

One cow says to the other, "You ever worry about that mad cow disease?"

The other cow says, "Why would I care? I'm a helicopter!"

I was in a motivational seminar about depression the other day, and she said I could be anything I wanted to be if I put my mind to it. Sometimes you just have to bite the bullet and do it, even if it's messy.

The other day, I walked up to someone who looked lost and he had all scraggy clothes on. I said, "Are you an orphan?"

He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"

I said, "Your parents, buddy."

Why did the suicidal man walk in front of the car? To get to the other side.

What did one copper say to the other? C U.

Mom tells her son to go to the other kid, to walk to the kid just standing still, to clap so the kid can hear and move out of the way of the car.

But her son was blind, the other kid had no legs so he couldn't walk, and the kid has no arms so he couldn't clap, and the kid died because he couldn't hear; he was deaf.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the other side. Y'all knew this one, fr.

My cousin is in a wheelchair and wanted to battle.

So I went up a step and said, "It's over Anakin, I have the high ground!"

Why did the emo cross the road?

To not get to the other side.

What do you call an orphan if every other orphan gets picked?

Someone: Ugly?

Me: No, trick question, they are still an orphan.

I hate when my brother dates other people.

Just kidding! 😵😵😵😵

I bought a ceiling fan the other day.

It was a complete waste of money.

He just stands there applauding and saying, "Ooh, I love how smooth it is."

Why did the Canadian cross the road?

To say sorry to the other side.