Otherness jokes
I told a seal a joke, it went like this: "Why did the kid cross the playground?" He said, "Why?" I said, "To get to the other slide." And then he said, "That's the sealiest thing I've ever heard!"
I heard an unusual word the other day: "Opaque."
Unfortunately, what it means is unclear.
Q. What color were Mohammed Atta’s eyes?
A. Blue, one blue this way and one blue the other way.
What did one twin say to the other?
"Watch out for the plane!"
If two feminazis are carpet munchers, which one in the lesbian relationship cooks?
They both don't because both of the carpet munchers are too busy eating each other's pussy 😋 🤪 😌 😏 😜 👍 👍 👌 👌 👏 🏆 🥇 💭 🤔 😮 😁 😊 😃 😄 👌 😍 🥰 ☺️
What’s the difference between McDonald’s and 9/11?
One is a drive through; the other is a fly through.
Q: What did the ocean say to the other ocean?
A: Nothing, they just waved! 🙃
Two friends are arguing and one friend says, "Jason Warhis is not afraid of water and not ifs, ands, or buts about it."
And the other friend says, "Butt he is."
Why did the kid cross the playground? To get to the other slide!
What did one Geodude say to the other Geodude?
Let’s rock!
Two windmills stand at a farm. One asks the other, "What is your favorite kind of music?"
The other windmill replies, "I'm a huge metal fan!"
Me: Why did the chicken cross the road?
My friend: To get to the other side?
Me: No, to get to the idiot's house.
My friend: Oh.
Me: Knock knock.
My friend: Who's there?
Me: The chicken.
A donut and depression are the same. Both have nothing in the middle, and the other is nothing is left if you leave it for too long.
Two balls sit inside a bucket. One turned to another and said, "Hey man, boing, are you sentient, too?"
The other one said, "I’m sapient, you are sentient!"
BOINGZINGA!?!
Why did the man go across the train tracks to get to the other side?
What’s the difference between KFC and a woman on her period?
One is finger-licking good, and the other is just a fast-food restaurant.
A guy and his girl just finished making love.
Just as they lay next to each other, the girl asks, "Have you thought about any baby names?"
The guy then takes his condom off and ties it, and says, "Well, probably David Copperfield, if he gets out of this!"
I saw a bus the other day with some boy scouts at the back. One of them was having fun getting his knot-tying badge.
What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping bag?
One is dangerous for kids if put on their face, the other one is used to carry groceries.
How are an orphan and baseball different from each other?
A baseball game has a home run.