One jokes

This town ain't big enough for the one of you.

One time, I worked at the zoo and I was feeding the monkeys.

And one of them μяɨɲąţ€ď on me.

And I went to the hospital and got a bloody nose the next day.

What's the difference between taking a shit and the Ottawa police force?

Usually taking a shit only requires one ass wipe!

Texas is such a shitty state. There’s a reason it only has one star.

Why are orphans good at dodge ball?

No one misses them.

There’s only one answer to who would win, 1996 Bulls or 2017 Warriors...

...Steve Kerr’s team.

What do you call a deer with no ear?

One ear.

Alright, class, we have 39 students and 40 seats.

That one dyslexic kid thinking he’s Superman:

How many police officers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two: one to change the lightbulb, and the other to open fire while the room is dark.

One time I was playing a bongo at a Chinese restaurant.

But they were competing against a Cuban restaurant and killed me.

McDonald's sweet chili chicken one.

Yo momma so fat that it was hard to find the G spot and slip her one at night.

What did one ass cheek say to the other?

"Blimey, what's that smell coming from the corridor?"

Anyone remember the following?

Why can't men play baseball?

Because no one can take the word "balls" seriously anymore.

What's the one thing that makes a depressed person jump? A bridge.

Orphans have tasted all cookies except for homemade ones.

If I had a dime for everytime the Australian president shat himself in a McDonald's, I would have one dime, which is not a lot, but it's weird that it happened.

Tell me a joke about my hairline.

No, because he don't got one, feel like Donald Trump, it don't move.

You're so fat, you went on a scale and it said, "One at a time."