One jokes
Me: How do you celebrate Christmas?
Orphan: I don't know what you mean.
Me: There is no one to give a present.
Did you hear about that one guy who dipped his balls in paint?
My friend said they were “Pretty nuts!”
One of my friends got a haircut, and everyone giggled and bullied him... I didn’t, I died of laughter 😂
Your hairline is so far back that if you wore yellow, people would think you were One Punch Man.
I got fired from the bowling ball factory for throwing out the ones that had holes in them.
Did you know one of the singers of YMCA had AIDS? Y-M-C-AIDS.
My grandma's got 99 problems, but a fat butt ain't one of 'em.
Yo mama's so fat, people think she only has one side!
My science teacher was talking about natural selection.
At one point, she asked me to name the first person to theorize about it. I said, "Eric Harris." It was on his shirt.
If you don't get the joke, look up "Eric Harris natural selection."
Why can't orphans be gay?
There's no one to call "daddy."
Two cyclists stop on a bridge. One cyclist says to the other, "Can you see that forest over there?"
The other says, "No, the trees are in the way."
"We are Number one."
I told a joke at a funeral, but no one laughed. One mf was ded though💀.
I was at the park the other day and sat down on the bench next to a mum and her daughter, and she asked which one was my kid, and I said I haven't decided yet.
Why don't Chinese people believe in Santa Claus?
They're the ones that make the toys.
Stephen Hawking can pass any test, but there's one test he can't pass. It is the PACER test.
One day, a class of children were killed in a bus accident, but only some survived. One was praying that he would survive, and the other said, "First time?"
One day my mom told me not to be an actor. I said, "But mommy, I will make a lot of money!"
Two people stood in one room. The first guy stared at the second.
First guy: “Sorry I had to punch you. It was a game, bro.”
Second guy: “Between me and you talking, there’s almost no PUNCH line. Hah!”
One day I went to talk to my friend.
"Hi John!" I said.
No response.
"Oh, yeah."
I went to pick up the remote and clicked the unmute button.
"Hope that helps!"