Ocean jokes
What is a dry swimmer?
Not in the water...
What’s bin Laden got in common with SpongeBob?
Both can be found at the bottom of the sea, and they’re filled with holes.
What did the woman on the beach say to Michael Jackson? Hey, get out of my sun!
What did the water say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
If you play the movie "Jaws" in reverse, it's a heartwarming story about a shark who gives arms and legs to disabled people.
Q: What's a ship's least favorite food? A: Iceburg-ers
I ate Nemo.
Your mom went to the ocean, and the whales said, "We are family," even though you are fatter than me.
What do you call a whale on a beach?
Banked.
What passengers were happy that the Titanic sank?
The lobsters in the kitchen.
What did the pirate say when he saw a ghost? He said, "Oh my God, it's me dead parrot!"
Did you hear the passengers on the Titanic invited Yo Momma and the Titanic crew said, "Man overboard!"
What's at the bottom of the ocean and shivers?
A nervous wreck.
"Not all treasure is silver and gold, mate."
"Jack Sparrow."
"Captain, Captain Jack Sparrow!"
What do Nemo and my dad have in common?
They both can't be found.
Why couldn't the surfer hang 10?
Because he forgot his feats!
There were people having sex when it started sinking. Legend tells when you go near the ship you can see semen, and if you listen close enough you'll hear them moaning.
Now that's a hell of a ghost story!
We destroyed two boats, and they dropped the sun on us twice!
In 1492 Christopher Columbus sailed the ocean blue.
He sat on a rock, tickled his cock, until it turned red, white, and blue!