Surf

Surf jokes

Ocean

  • What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just WAVED. Can you SEA what I did there? I'm SHORE you did. Why are you so SALTY? Don't be a BEACH.

    Wave

  • Me: That’s a good WAVE.

    Friend: I SEA it.

    Wave: Doesn't break for us to surf on.

    Me: I was SHORE it would be good.

    Friend: I SEA what you did there.

    Beach

  • Wash It Away - By Bradley Lewis(watersharky) and Ben Lewis and Watersharky Music Productions - Why does it always feel like I'm the one that's had a bad day?

    Whether I'm stuck in traffic or showing up to work late,

    Oh this 9 to 5 feels like 9 to forever been working all week

    For a jerk that thinks they can say whatever they want to me

    I'll just bite my tongue for a couple more days

    Soon I'll be in that island sun surfing those waves

    I need the beach I love the ocean

    Put my feet in the sand

    Watch the earth in motion

    Ya had a bad week ya had a bad day

    Take it to the shoreside and wash it away

    Oh yeah

    You gotta wash it away

    Finally I'm here and I can't even stop myself from smiling

    Somebody hand me a beer and I'll check the girls on the island

    Don't miss my 9 to 5

    Living like a local on this island time

    I got those sandy toes and nobody knows jump in the ocean and just go with the flow

    I'll miss my sandy toes

    I've got to go back before you know this island is my home

    I need the beach I love the ocean

    Put my feet in the sand

    Watch the earth in motion

    Ya had a bad week ya had a bad day

    Take it to the shoreside and wash it away

    Oh yeah

    You gotta wash it away

    Wash it away

    I need the beach I love the ocean

    Put my feet in the sand

    Watch the earth in motion

    Ya had a bad week ya had a bad day

    Take it to the shoreside and wash it away

    Oh yeah

    You gotta

    Wash it away

    Wash it away

    Suicide

  • Fuck it, suicide is wrong, but if you jump off a bridge and yell "parkour," it's a failed stunt.

  • 17
  • Shark

  • A shark can swim faster than me, but I can run faster than a shark.

    So in a triathlon, it would all come down to whoever can ride a bike the fastest.

  • 0
  • Sailing

  • The Somalian Olympics Team has just apologized to the Olympic Committee after realizing that sailing and shooting were two separate events.

  • 2
  • Meat

  • Spongebob and Jacko have one thing in common.

    They both routinely place meat in small buns.

  • 1
  • Community talk

  • Shower thoughts. U know u have serious acne when blind people try to read ur face-As a kid my parents taught me to not believe everything I see on TV, now I have to teach them to not believe everything they see on Facebook-Aliens invaded the Moon on July 20th, 1969— Vehicles today can surf the web, link to your phone, stream music and videos, etc.. but they still can't perform a simple database lookup to tell you what the check engine light is on for.-If you run at 11pm you are a night person. If you run at 5am you are a morning person. If you run at 3am you are a suspicious person

  • Shower Thoughts:

    - Cheating in exams is just studying at the wrong time. - Parents are the opposite of fake friends. They have your back when you aren't there and talk shit about you to your face. - Technically, the biggest difference between surfing and snowboarding is just the temperature of the water. - If a tomato is a fruit, is ketchup a smoothie? - Does a straw have one hole or two? - Can you daydream at night? - When you’re alone in a room, you’re the only person in the world who can see what you can. - Millions of people are in synchronization with your breathing right now.