Jack Sparrow jokes

Why is the rum gone?

I've got a jar of dirt! I've got a jar of dirt, and guess what's inside it!

"Jack Sparrow."

"Captain, Captain Jack Sparrow!"

"The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem." - Jack Sparrow

One does not simply hand over a jar of dirt.

"Not all treasure is silver and gold, mate."

"Did everyone see that because I will not be doing it again."

- Captain Jack Sparrow

Why are pirates called pirates? Because they arrrrrrrr!

Why are pirates named pirates?

Cuz they arrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Today, I spotted Johnny Depp on the clearance rack at Kmart. Kmart is currently trying to clear its inventory of wife-beaters.

What's the difference between Johnny Depp and an Aussie bloke in Bali?

Both are expert drunks, but the Aussie is 100 times better kept. Johnny Depp, in contrast, looks like a demented leader of a violent drug cartel.