My jokes

I got home one day and a Spanish guy, white guy, black guy told me that your sister knows her meats.

She won a trophy. We blindfolded her, then my sister said, "Yeah, I was blindfolded, and I gave all three of them blowjobs and I had to guess which flavor of the meat it was."

The Trophy said Best Blowjobs. As a brother, I couldn't be prouder.

Roses are red,

My nuts are bigger than your small balls, that's why I get all the bitches.

When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people.

I have fuck and sex with all the sexy naked ladies and they suck my balls (penis), but you ain't have no girlfriend. Your only friend, they call him ching chong coz of your hairline.

My dad died in 9/11. He was the best pilot.

What do you call lesbians having sex?

My cheating dyke ex-wife!

I always say I'm single, which annoys my wife.

My sister Wani is a dwarf, so I sit on her as a chair.

I was naughty at school and my teacher said she's going to tell my dad. I was like, "Who's that?"

Mom: Son, where are my condoms?

Son: What are condoms?

Dad: She puts it on me and the sandwich.

Son: Wait, why did my girlfriend come over and take one?

Dad: Um, I don't know, but go to bed.

Son: But it's 2:46pm in the afternoon, bruh.

People in 1912: The Titanic is unsinkable!

Iceberg: Hold my beer.

My friend: You're so skinny, you never miss the elevator when it's closing. You just slip right through!😂

Me thinking it's a gift from God: 🕴️😎

"Mmmmmmmm, daddy, f*ck me harder. I love you, daddy, mmmm. I luv your cock, mmmm, lick me, lick my clit, daddy!"

My Mom said, "I have a daughter that killed herself for getting bullied."

Well, I said, "Have you seen her?"

"Cummy wummy all over my mummy."

Why is my plane delayed?

Because someone hit the Sears Tower.

Roses are red, violets are blue, You'll suck my dick 'cause I'm stronger than you.

A Middle Eastern man comes to the states to do a stand up show. He starts by saying “2 Jews walk into a bar, NOT IN MY COUNTRY!”

This kinda reminds me of when my mum was feeding me. She always used to say, "Open wide for the delicious plane."

A Chinese teacher's phone rang as he was going to class, and he said:

"My phone the ring ring, it's my wife ring ring."