Would you mind just peeing into this cup please? It's the one the annoying receptionist uses.
It’s sad how my friend was struck from the medical register for sleeping with a patient. He was a great vet.
My 1 year old nephew had a stroke. I know, sounds bad ... but he would have needed to learn how to speak and walk anyways.
My proctologist used to be a photographer, he took x-rays and told me to bend over and say cheese
A woman goes into labor with her child. The doctor says that they have invented a new device to transfer the pain of child birth to the father. He asks if it is ok to use the new device. The couple agrees and so he turns the pain to the father to 10%. The man feels nothing. They then bump it up to 20%. He still feels nothing then his friend calls and he is groaning he said he was having cramps so the husband tell the docter "doc turn it up to 40%" so he does and his friend throws up so he said "doc turn it up to 100%" and his friend dies
What do you call a person whose Lymphoma keeps recurring?
A Lymphomaniac
what's the difference between me and an old man no one pulled my life support
A guy goes in to get some tests done, the doctor comes out and says "I got good news and bad news." The guy says "Ok, let's get the bad news out of the way." The doctor says "The tests cam back positive, you got 2 weeks to live." The guy says, "Oh My God!! Then what the hell is the good news?" Doctor says "You see that nurse over there, the one with the big tits? I'm screwin her."
A Pedphile brings his Eight year old Daughter to the doctors office. The doctor asked her if she would like some Candy? Her father replies please no more candy for her i gave her enough today.
I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point.
As a doctor myself, there nurse was very slow, she tested my patience!
why do they cal it abortion? because they aborted the misson.
I wish Stephen Hawking was an organ donor. I need some parts for my laptop
"A priest, an imam, and a rabbit walk into a clinic to donate blood. The rabbit turns to the nurse and says, 'I think I'm a Type-O.'"
What part in the body does an adult not need but actually needs to live?
A KIDNey
what do you call a doctor that's a skeleton? doctor bones
Whoever Stole My Anti-Depression Medications I Hope You're Happy!
why cant a orphan get vaccine. they need parental permission
a doctor slept with one of his patients and thought to him self this is wrong but some doctors do it... he is a vet
Let me just remove my finger from your bottom. Thank you nurse.
