Make jokes
Being a mom to a teenager will make you understand why some animals eat their young.
I finally asked my deadbeat dad what makes him happy. His answer? He hasn't gotten back to me.
If you can make a woman laugh, you're almost there.
If you're almost there and then she laughs, then you've got a whole different problem on your hands.
What do you call a factory that makes okay products?
"A satisfactory."
How do rappers make their money?
By dropping dimes.
What comment did the United States Senator Kamla Harris make when one of her 64% blue dog democrat constituents called her incompetent?
"Sometimes I sits and thinks, and sometimes I just sits!"
Are you a razor? 'Cause you make me red.
What's the difference between someone with dystonia and someone with misophonia?
One makes the annoying noises, while the other hates the annoying noises.
Alright, I'm gonna make like a tree and leaf.
*****You have to leave right after you tell this joke.****
How do you make a tissue dance?
You put a little boogie in it.
What does a doctor do to make you better?
Helium.
My diet:
Make all of my friends cupcakes. The fatter they get, the thinner I look...
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.
"Did you guys make sure Stephen was plugged in?"
A person with a wheelchair makes a joke. No one laughs.
Inner thought: "Wheely Manerva, wheely."
What makes a software developer feel rich?
Their cache.
What goes in and comes out and makes you feel good but isn't sexual?
(Insulin)
What's the resemblance between a microwave and human reproduction?
They both make a sound at the end.
My friend thinks he is funny.
He told me that the only food that makes you cry is an onion, so I threw a coconut at him.
"We make sexy time, yes, and every night I tap that."