When the Chinese make up 10% of the population, they are pacifists. When the Chinese make up 50%, this will become a Chinese province. When the Chinese make up 70%, you will be in a concentration camp.
Wanna make out, Explain Bear?
Are you a blood bender? 'Cause you're making my blood go southđź–¤.
When you hear Michael Jackson talk about his "perfect 10," make sure you hide your 10-year-old son.
I’d make fun of transgender women, but that’s low hanging fruit.
While an unsuspecting father's at the office making money, this 18 year old son will spend his day in mother's cunny.
We're at the breakfast table, father eats and takes his calls, he doesn't know my mother's toes are kneading at my balls.
What did the Buddhist say to the pizza delivery boy?
"Make me one with everything."
Why should you never trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
What makes an ISIS joke funny?
The execution.
What are the basic ingredients when a cannibal makes a sandwich?
2 slices of Brad.
An old man goes to a church and is making a confession:
Man: "Father, I am 75 years old. I have been married for 50 years. All these years I had been faithful to my wife, but yesterday I was intimate with an 18-year-old."
Father: "When was the last time you made a confession?"
Man: "I never have, I am Jewish."
Father: "Then why are telling me all this?"
Man: "I’m telling everybody!"
In a Catholic school cafeteria, a nun places a note in front of a pile of apples, "Only take one. God is watching." Further down the line is a pile of cookies. A little boy makes his own note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."
How do you restrain a straight person? Give them a straight jacket.
How do you restrain a trans person? Make the trans vest tight.
Why did the rapper wear a watch to the studio?
He wanted to make TIMELESS TRACKS.
I should probably stop making emo jokes.
They just don't seem to cut it anymore.
Why do trans women make the best golf course grounds staff?
They’re enthusiastic about getting rid of unwanted balls.
What did Warner Brothers get for making that horrible Joker sequel?
They got what they fucking deserved!!!!!!!!
Why do disabled people make good golfers?
Because they're always handicapped.
How do you make a dishwasher work again?
Smack her ass and say "get back to work!"
When Pope Pius IX died, he went to Heaven, knocked at the door, and St. Peter opened it: "Who are you? What do you want?”
"I am Pope Pius. I want to come to Heaven.”
“Where do you come from?"
"Rome."
“What do you mean? Rome, Massachusetts, or Rome, New York?"
"No, Rome, Italy, of course."
“I'm very sorry, but I do not know you!”
To make sure not to erroneously deny access to an authorized person, Saint Peter takes the telephone, calls up God, and asks: "Hello, Boss, here is a guy who says he is the Pope of Rome, do you know him?"
"What do you mean: Rome, Massachusetts, or Rome, New York?"
"No, Rome, Italy, of course."
"No, sorry, I don’t know him.”
Saint Peter makes another telephone call and rings up Jesus: "Hello, Junior, here’s a guy who says he is the Pope of Rome, do you know him?"
"Rome, Massachusetts, or Rome, New York?"
"Rome, Italy."
"No, sorry, never heard of him.”
Saint Peter still does not give up and finally calls up the Holy Ghost and asks: "Hello, Smoky, here is a guy who says he is the Pope of Rome. Do you know him?"
"What does he mean, Rome, Massachusetts, or Rome, New York?"
"He says Rome, Italy."
"No, sorry, I’m afraid I do not know this guy." But then, after a very short while, he continues: "Wait, wait, tell me, is that the guy who invented the damn story about Mary and me?"
