Make a jokes

I was making a coffee for my boss and this was the supposed recipe:

1 egg 1 tomato diced bell peppers a bag of sugar sea salt coffee beans rusted nails.

I got fired and spent the next 20 years in prison with a dude named Papa Bear.

I can make a living with the "Treat Yo self" budget.

Yet I can’t use the "Help yo self" budget.

One time, I was making a caramel apple.

When I mistook 1 gallon of caramel for 1 camel!

Suck on a finger, once bite it off, taste it, put some ketchup on it, wait, I'm making a mess, I bit it off!

If I make a great joke, I will pay for it.

I'm doing a new thing where you say an object in the comments, and I will try to make a joke based off the object.

If you are interested, you can submit an object in the comments.

I will give the person credit each joke I do.

Hillary Clinton would make a good president.

What makes a bird fly?

Bird food!

Once, there was a brother and a sister that shared a YouTube channel. He named it "Penis Dick Marathon."

A pirate walks into a tavern with a pirate ship attached to his nutty wuttys. It's driving me nuts!

A troll proceeds to pull out a desert eagle and shoot the pirate in the face. He makes a poggers face and says, "Problem??"

How does a rapper make a burrito?

With WRAPPING paper, DUUUHHHHHH!

How do you make a trash can leak?

Hit it with an axe until it becomes part of the cosmos!

Why do orphans not play baseball?

Because they can't make a home run.

I'd make a farming joke, but I'm just a little less than corny enough.

How do you make a Tico dance? You put a little boogie in it.

What did the atom say to the positive in math class? "We could make a positive number!"

How do you make a baby float?

You take your foot off its head.

How does the Eskimo make a house of cards?

Igloos it.

Well, I was gonna make a joke about drunk people, but that would be good for the health.

I'd make a 9/11 joke, but they always crash and burn.