Lifestyle jokes
Why did the hobo cross the road?
To get the rotten donut on the other side.
Yo mama so fat, she needs 500,000 calories a day to keep her fueled.
Even though you are a meateater, you can still totally be a vegetarian.
How many emos does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, because they just sit and cry in the dark.
This dude is so fat, wearing the same damn clothes every day. Every time he turns around, it's his graduation day. He forgot to put a boomerang on his pants because they don't even fit anymore. Last time I saw him coming down the street, it was in a bucket of Popeye's chicken, extra crispy.
What's the last thing emos feel before they die? Rope burn.
How do you fit three gay guys on a bar stool?
Flip it upside down.
What do you call a Muslim who drinks, smokes, and fools around with other women?
Turkish.
What does a furry call a sexy furry?
A foxy lady!
Why do emo people hang each other? Because they're too "Hengruy."
What do me and an emo kid have in common:
We both like to hang.
The neighbor’s children challenged me to a water fight.
I’m just checking my Facebook quickly before the kettle boils.
I turned gay because my wife is too poor.
I took my friend skydiving once, and he jumped out of the plane without a parachute. Then I remembered he was emo.
What’s the difference between rap lovers and the Gigachad?
Rap lovers get more pussy.
What is an old lady's favorite exercise?
Trying to get up from the soft couch.
What do you call a happy cowboy? A jolly rancher.
Your mum eats cabbage.
The mom and dad left the child because they were famous and rich, like rich monkeys.
Nah, they eat emo meals.