Law jokes

The time when Michael Jackson came in his pajamas during the trial. Whether or not it was because he saw a 7-year-old boy has yet to be determined.

If there are 4 Mexicans in a van, which of them is driving?

None of them. Immigration service is.

My grandma has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo.

A cop pulls a guy over for suspected drunk driving. The cop opens the door and the driver falls out onto the asphalt. The cop says, "Holy shit, you're so drunk, you can't even walk!"

The drunk says, "No shit, that's why I took my car!"

I woke up one day to find handcuffs on my bed. Turns out, the girl I drugged yesterday escaped.

I was at the club and then my dad walked up and said, "You're 15, why are you high and at the club?" So I ran. Then my uncle was at the car and took me home, so I was grounded. Then my boyfriend came because my parents went out and we had sex and we were very loud. My dad came home and walked in. He had my boyfriend pin me against the wall so my dad could spank me.

It’s sad how my friend was struck from the medical register for sleeping with a patient.

He was a great vet.

What do you get when you cross a pedophile and an elementary school? Predator 3.

Why do orphans like to be robbers in cops and robbers?

So they will be wanted.

Why do orphans go to prison?

Because that's their only home.

A shoplifter tried to rob a grocery store.

He was asked to give an "eggsplanation."

I walked in on my little sister when she was naked.

The thing I have to say is that my little sister is a big sister with big tits & ass with juicy lips upstairs & downstairs. I say whoever is going to be my brother-in-law is going to be a very happy person.

What did Bill Cosby say on the second date?

"Hi, nice to meet you."

"Can we at least give them one credit—for abiding the traffic laws?"

What's the difference between an emo and a prisoner?

The prisoner is wanted!

Roses are red, violets are blue, don't let your kids next to Prince Andrew.

I hate double standards. Burn a body at a crematorium, you're "being a respectful friend." Do it at home and you're "destroying evidence."

What did the teacher say when he raped his naughty student?

"Face the wall!"

Why does an orphan wanna be a criminal?

Because they wanna be wanted.

What did the pedophile say to the kids?

"FUCK!"