Law Jokes

A teenager brings her new boyfriend home to meet her parents. They’re appalled by his haircut, his tattoos, his piercings.

Later, the girl’s mom says, “Dear, he doesn’t seem to be a very nice boy.”

“Oh, please, Mom!” says the daughter. “If he wasn’t nice, would he be doing 500 hours of community service?”

If you're ever bored, just rape an orphan, what are they going to do, tell their parents!

Hahaha come on people, they don't have parents, we can do what we like with them...

Rape...hurt...and sell them!

What sound does a baby make when you put it in a blender? I don’t know. I was too busy wanking.

Did you hear on the news that a midget psychic broke out of jail?

There is a small medium at large.

Age is just a number.

Police are just people.

Jail is just a room.

The image shows a screenshot from a Wikipedia page about Irish inventions. The page lists inventions across different centuries. In the 14th century, two items are listed: Caid and Whiskey. After that there is a 300 year gap until the 17th century where a few more inventions are listed. The text above the screenshot states that the 300-year gap in Irish inventions after whiskey was invented is a favorite thing.

What kind of file turns a 5mm hole into a 3cm hole?

A pedo-file.

I was at a friend's place yesterday, and... There was a mother, father, three sons, and a daughter.

That night the mother and father started fucking each other. I yelled and told them there are innocent children in this house.

An hour later, they started up again. I walked to their room and they were asleep, so I looked in the brothers' room and all three brothers were fucking the sister.

I sighed at this. "Incest aside, you guys make a cute family." I started, "So Anna, when am I gonna have nieces and nephews?" They stopped instantly and went to sleep. "Thank you," I replied before walking back to my room they let me sleep in and I passed out for the rest of the night.

My dad died, so I dug his grave. I was asked why I murdered him. I answered, "Guess we'll never know who did it because he dug his own grave." My father was William Afton.

When a woman decides to abort, it is called a decision, but when I run my truck into a playground of kids, it is called murder.

I hate these double standards.

Burn a body at a crematorium and you're doing a good thing, burn a body at home and you're destroying evidence.

She said no, so I raped her.

Women be like if men are gone, Earth would be a better place, (forgetting) women help to create war, weapons, animal and human cruelty, and have helped to enforce laws that oppress them.