Law jokes
Why do orphans like pedos? Because they have someone to call "daddy."
You go up to a bar and say, "Hi." He doesn’t look at you. You keep saying, "Hi." He says, "What?" Then you realize that he is the one that you stole his lady from, but then he doesn’t give you any drink. You say, "Why?" He screams at you and then says, "YOU'RE FIVE!"
Why don’t pedophiles win races?
They like to come in a little behind.
Why did the duck get arrested?
He tried to quack a safe.
Why did the Drill Sergeant get in trouble?
He got caught playing with his Privates!
Memes
Your mother is so fast, she got arrested for carrying 10 pounds of crack.
I took my son to a driver's school and am surprised because he got his license but soon lost the privilege to drive a car because he ran over my ex on "accident."
(I gotta go pay him out of jail!)
What's the difference between an emo and a prisoner?
The prisoner is wanted!
Maybe the reason there isn't any physical evidence is because it didn't happen.
What can’t a Black person say to a police officer?
"Thanks for the warning."
Banker: I have the right to take your money!
Me: Check my name.
Banker: Robin D. Bank, why?
Banker: *realizes*
Me: 😈🖐️ Gimme, gimme.
If a kid refused to go to bed, does that make them guilty of resisting a rest?
I lit a retirement home on fire so that all the seniors can be cremated for free.
Q: Why did Bill Cosby get away with it?
A: Because the women were all Cosby-ing for it!
1, 2, I have a gun.
3, 4, I am in a school.
5, 6, Everyone on the ground!
A blonde accidentally kills a cop and calls the police.
She exclaims, “Hello, is this 911?”
The other person, “Yes, what is your emergency?”
The blonde answered, “I called to inform you that you’re 910 now.”
What do you get when you cross A-Rod with Chris Brown?
Cheater, cheater, woman beater!
My friend got arrested for shooting an unarmed black teen.
He was charged for impersonating a police officer.
Why should you always wear rubber?
So you don’t leave DNA evidence.
What's the hardest part of being a pedophile?
Fitting in.