Law jokes
I will always remember my grandpa's last words after robbing a bank: "Oh, shit! The pigs are catching up!" But the cops did not kill him; he drove full speed off a cliff.
What’s the best part of raping an 11 year old girl?
Killing the little bitch after you’ve finished with her.
Q: How do you know a wishing well works?
A: If your mother-in-law falls down it.
What do you call a paraplegic cannibal?
"Dine and dash."
If the shoe doesn't fit, there's no evidence.
I'm late for my interview! Do you know where the nearest sex offender registry is?
Why do lawyers use Viagra? To grow taller.
The doctor gave his patient 1 day of life, so he shot him. Then the judge gave him 15 years, so there you go, problem solved.
If you're ever bored, just punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
If she’s old enough to breed, she’s old enough for me.
What's the number 1 cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.
Why did the orphan rob the bank? Because he wanted to know what it felt like to be wanted.
What's the difference between a wanted person and a wanted handicapped person? The handicapped person wasn’t last seen on foot.
Why do so many people hate Bill Cosby? I mean, all he did was have affairs with drunk, attention-seeking women. They literally begged for it.
Stephen Hawking got an engine swap with a Nissan 350Z, and they said his wheelchair wasn't street legal :/
I must have raped a woman in a skip. She said she felt rubbish.
When you accidentally choke your girlfriend to death and then realize that it's your sister so who gives a f**k?
What is the difference between orphans and serial killers?
Serial killers are wanted.
Why was the Human Torch arrested?
He had firearms.
OK, there are at least 3 pedophiles in your neighborhood.
But there are no pedophiles in my neighborhood; there are only three 10-year-old girls with juicy asses.