Law jokes
The time when Michael Jackson came in his pajamas during the trial. Whether or not it was because he saw a 7-year-old boy has yet to be determined.
Why does JD Vance not need a conviction?
His running mate has 34 of them!
Did you hear about the two people who stole a calendar?
They each got six months.
Why did the orphan become a killer?
Because he knew they would not look for him.
Why did the orphan become a criminal? It wants to be wanted.
Why are orphans good at being a criminal?
Because they're not wanted.
A cement mixer has collided with a prison van. Motorists are asked to look out for 16 hardened criminals.
Today was the worst day ever! My brother got run over, and I lost my driver's license!
If a deaf person is at court, then is it still called a hearing?
So Kenny finally found his one true love.
But he can't be with her because it's illegal to marry your sister.
A woman has been raped by a man. She calls the police, and a policeman shows up.
Woman: "Please help, officer! I have been raped!"
Officer: "No problem, ma'am, I will just unrape you."
Woman: "What? Unrape me? How?"
Officer proceeds to bring back the rapist and forces the woman to rape the rapist back in order to cancel out the initial rape.
Australian says to American: why do you have such bad gun laws?
American: Self defense.
Australian: Self defense against 50 innocent children?
If you drink, don’t drive. People cause accidents.
If you drink, don’t park. Accidents cause people.
Did you guys see on the news where they arrested that pervert at the Michaels Crafts store?
He was running around completely naked and had sprinkled glitter all over his testicles. I guess it was pretty nuts.
Why did Michael Jackson go to jail? He was feeling a little Randy.
What's the difference between sex and rape? Some effective drugs.
Ever heard of a rape victim with Alzheimer's?
Yeah, neither have they.
Why is reverse cowgirl banned in Alabama? Because you never turn your back on family.
Police arrested a man who dropped his phone in the ocean. The was charged with a salt in battery.
I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage.
I lost the case.