Law jokes
What's the difference between a criminal and an orphan?
One is wanted and one's not.
I drove through a school zone and found out you can drag a speed bump 😬.
You and me went up to stab your father. He was out, do not pout. They are coming after.
My friend got arrested for shooting an unarmed black teen.
He was charged for impersonating a police officer.
Today I gave a blind guy a gun and told him it was a hair dryer. Since I have no fingerprints, the police said it was suicide. I guess you can say I took care of him!
What is the difference between a human and the human rights act, a tree house, and a human being?
Orphans can be a robber if they want because their parents won't be disappointed.
How can you be friends with a pedophile that's a musician?
B minor.
What do you call a not potty trained human?
Amber Heard.
What's red, takes my belt, and what I got from a weird children's house?
An orphan.
Your forehead got a restraining order from your hairline.
Why can't orphans have sex?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Today sucked. My friend fell off a cliff, and I went to jail.
Why are most politicians in the closet or gay?
Because all they can do is mandate.
What’s the difference between a robber and an orphan?
One is wanted.
A man enters the bank and says, "Hi, I'm robbing you!" The man was arrested instantly.
Why can’t orphans be married?
Because they won’t have their parents' blessings.
These days, dating life is hard. You put yourself out there, and it's hard to find someone. The only thing to do is turn to family.
It is now legal to bully an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Roses are red, violets are blue, Bill Cosby will pudding rape you.