Language jokes
If you're born deaf, what language would you think in?
Knock knock!
Who is it?
Knock.
Knock who?
Knock you.
I'm dyslexic. My sister was reading, "What's the book?" I asked. She showed me the cover. "You reading 'The Scared Bull'?" I asked. She started laughing. "No, 'The Sacred Bull'!"
If a sped is late for class, is it wrong to call them tardy?
What do you call a?
"Déjà moo": The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
I went to visit my friend's sick grandpa. He was lying in a hospital bed connected to a lot of tubes. When I approached him, he kept repeating "Nǐ cǎizhe wǒ de yǎngqì guǎn."
Suddenly, right in front of me, he passed. Later that night, I translated his last words, and they were, "You're standing on my oxygen tube."
The past, the present, and the future walk into a bar.
It was tense.
Your Roblox friend counts to 10, but she doesn't count to "too." Then Roblox says: "Damn. Your Roblox friend can't count."
Corpses aren’t funny—they’re dead serious.
Do you like my a-corn-y jokes?
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Candace. Candace who? Candace be true, you don’t remember me?
I can’t watch anime anymore when my friend’s grandpa is in the house.
He hasn’t heard a Japanese person scream since the war.
Roses are red, That much is true, But violets are purple, Not F***ing blue!
It is a known fact that you cannot say “harassment” without “her ass.”
I guess you could say, “harassment something.”
How do you know when German people break into your house? When you can not find your bed.
What did Google Translate say to Siri?
"Why are you so Siri-ous?"
"I'm sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing. Except at a funeral.
What does a foreigner say when he comes to America?
I don't know, I don't speak foreignish...
Drawned.