Blow Jokes

random person

A female class teacher was having a problem with a boy in her class in Grade 3… The boy said, “Madam, I should be in Grade 4. I am smarter than my sister & she’s in Grade 4”.

The Madam had heard enough and took the boy to the principal.The principal decided to test the boy with some questions from Grade 4.

Principal: What is 3+3?

Boy: 6.

Principal: 6+6.

Boy: 12.

The boy got all the questions right. The principal told the Madam to send the boy to Grade 4 immediately. The Madam decided to ask her own questions and the principal agreed.

Madam: What does a cow have 4 of that I have only 2?

Boy: Legs.

Madam: What is in your trousers that I don’t have?

Boy: Pockets.

Madam: What starts with a C and ends with T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid?

Boy: Coconut.

Madam: What goes in hard & then comes out soft & sticky?

The principal’s eyes opened really wide, but before he could stop the answer, the boy was taking charge

Boy: Bubble gum.

Madam: You stick your pole inside me. You tie me down to get me up, I get wet before you do.

Boy: Tent.

The principal was looking restless

Madam: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you are bored. The best man always has me first?.

Boy: Wedding ring.

Madam: I come in many sizes. When I’m not well, I Drip. When you blow me, you feel good?

Boy: Nose.

Madam: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates, I come with a quiver.

Boy: Arrow.

Principal: O MY GOD.

Madam: What starts with ‘F’ and ends wit a ‘K’ and if you don’t get it, you’ve to use your hand?

Boy: Fork.

Madam: What is it that all men have, it’s longer in some men than others, the Pope doesn’t use his and a man gives it to his wife after marriage?

Boy: Surname.

Principal: Ohooo !

Madam: What part of the man has no bone but has muscles with a lot of veins like pumpkin and is responsible for making love?

Boy: Heart.

Principal: Eeeeeh! The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to the Madam, “Send this bloody boy to the university. I myself got all the answers wrong!”

Anonymous

What did the wind say to the palm tree? Hold onto your nuts this is no ordinary blow job.

7
Anonymous

a boy walks in on his mother riding his father. “What are you doing?”, the boys asks his mother. “I’m jumping on daddy to make him thin”,said the mother. Don’t bother", said the boy," when you go shopping, the lady next door comes and blows him up again"

5
Anonymous
in JFK

JFK was one of the most open-minded presidents. It really blows my mind how great he was.

I was on a bus when this girl offered to blow me for $5…

‎…and never being a person to pass up a good deal, I gave her $5 and watched her do her thing. After she was finished she lit up a cigarette and started smoking right there on the bus.

I was disgusted. I thought to myself, “What is this world coming to? Who sells cigarettes to a 12 year old?”

Anonymous
in Difference

What’s the difference between a paycheck and your penis? You don’t have to beg your wife to blow up the paycheck…

1
nota guy

How do you blow up an Indian person?

You press the red button.

9
Anonymous

I heard a neat little trick you can use to have a public pool all to yourself. If you blow a whistle 3 times, everyone will just get out!

in Gun

i gave a blind kid a gun and said it was a blow dyer

Anonymously
in Difference

What’s the difference between a suicide bomber and puberty?

Puberty waits the blow up

How does Jesus whistle? bye s blowing through the holes in is hands

not vlad

A guy walks into a mosque … then blows up.

Anonymous
in Bear

I told my friend that someone accused him of blowing dead bears. I said I defended him by responding that I saw 1 get up and walk away.

Death

🎶Rock a bye baby on the tree Top, when the wind blows the baby will drop. Then the baby will lay on the ground, not moving a muscle not making a sound.🎶

Maverick
in Religion

Muslims love to exaggerate, that’s why they always blow things up.

2
Get in the van rn.

What does JFK’s killer and a prostitute have in common? “They both blow heads”.

savage redneck
in Blonde

what does a blondie and a shotgun have in common? give them a cock and there ready to blow.

Anonymous
in Blonde

why do blondes make bad bankrobbers? because they tie up the safe and blow the guards.

Anonymous

Everyone’s had a mind-blowing day before, just ask JFK.

Have you driven through Dealey plaza it will blow your mind~john f. Kennedy